October 2015

10/31/2015

Welcome, November


Hey friends!

I hope you all had a nice Halloween. 


I'm not going to make a long, ramble-y post today. Mostly because I'm getting ready to queue a bunch of South of Nowhere recaps/reviews for the 12th, 13th, and 14th. 

Why all the South of Nowhere posts? Well, because I'll be missing the 8th episode of HTGAWM. So I wanted to make it up to you guys who read my posts about Wes and the accomplices and the rest of those people. Don't worry, though, I'll be sure to recap it when I get back home! Promise me you'll read!
Anyways, I want you all to stay safe during November. Make sure to eat food this month! We have a whole holiday for it! 

Do your best in school and hope for snow and all of that other stuff! Go kiss a friend! Go do whatever you want! 

Sorry, recapping South of Nowhere makes me like this. 

Just be the person Mr. Rogers wanted you to be. 

10/30/2015

How To Get Away With Murder RECAP: 2x06 Two Birds, One Millstone


Last episode, Annalise convinced her side piece (Nate counts as a side piece still, right? Annalise has no main man or woman anymore, so I'm just... I'm totally confused on how this side piece stuff works if your husband got murdered by a potential side piece. And then you met up with your lesbian lover from Harvard and things are complicated there too... and then you pin the murder of your husband on your side piece that may have gotten upgraded to a main piece because your husband got murdered by potential side piece... that was a total mindfuck for me. Annalise Keating, get yo shit together!) that she had to pin the murder of Sam on him because she needed to protect Bonnie. Asher was going to testify against everyone because ~morals~. Oliver wants to get paid to do illegal shit for Annalise, which worries me. The gay male version of Kalinda Sharma needs to get his boyfriend's shit together because there is nothing good about Annalise Keating's house. Just because you can earn money doesn't mean you should do it! The pay is great, sure, but it's like working in a nursing home- morbid and emotionally tolling. And then the possible event of having to pull the plug on people- or having people pull the plugs on you.  We also found out that something really terrible happened to Bonnie in her childhood and basically protect Bonnie Winterbottom 2015. Frank and Laurel had sex and everyone died from the hotness. Levee/Aiden (yes I started watching South of Nowhere) got arrested for enough meth in the back of his car even your local drug dealers would be drooling out of their mouths. But why did he have all that meth? Your local hitman that everyone loves to pieces framed him, that's why! On lighter notes, Bonnie and Asher said I love you. And Connor told Oliver he loved him, which means that Connor is A Changed Man.

In the flashforward, we learn that Asher is actually involved with something for once! Bonnie gets in the car with him. She stops to go 'pee', but really, she's just washing off blood. She goes back to the car and Asher left to go talk to the police. Bitch, this is why you got left out of the first murder!

Predictions for 2x06:


  • This week, Jack Falahee teased that someone dies this episode. I've been worried about Connor's fate for awhile, so naturally that made me really, really fucking scared. But everyone has been guessing that it's Nia (Nate's dying wife), which would make a little bit of sense considering how Nate acts on Murder Night + Shooting. Killing off Nia would fill in some crucial puzzle pieces for why Nate wanted to help the Murder 4 (which, technically, should be considered Wes and the Accomplices- which would be a killer band name) and would explain why Nate was yelling at Annalise in the preview for this week's episode.
  • Levi's story doesn't end there, because I need to make South of Nowhere references that I haven't quite come up with yet. Although, after taking criminal justice in 11th grade, I know that possession of drugs charges are really hard to fight and you should just plead guilty.... Annalise Keating could totally win his case with Bullshit TV Law. Also, we need another fuckboy on HTGAWM these days. Connor isn't cutting it anymore after he got in a relationship.
  • Somehow Oliver gets involved with Annalise's shit, because we're not allowed to have nice things when we can have terrible, awful things involving Oliver.
  • I think there's a bit more to why Laurel is sleeping with Frank this episode. I mean, she was looking through stuff in the previews...
  • The hacked webcam had something to do with ADA Emily St Clair or Oliver. I'm leaning towards St Clair. 
  • Still think the adopted siblings are bumping uglies together. And before you say it- you can bump uglies with your sister and then move on from bumping uglies with your sister and get together with some other adopted girl with a great sense of style. 
  • Since Pete Nowalk said that if we didn't care about what happened at Trotter Lake he'd consider you an awful person, I'm going to come out with a theory so absurd it'll make the trees with epilepsy theory from LOST look normal. The girl from Trotter Lake was a minor who wanted to party with some frat boys. Shit went down and she got drunk and frat boys did awful things to her, like rape and then she might have died.
I am so scared about this episode. I'm biting my nails while watching the last few seconds of scandal.

Flashforward. Annalise is at the hospital. Frank rushes in and wants to know what's happening. He's begging them not to let her die. He goes back to his car and he has Catherine's dead body in there. Are you fucking kidding me Frank? Again?




2 weeks back.

Frank and Laurel are doing things that count as softcore porn. Laurel's hair looks fucking amazing this episode. Anyways.... Laurel looks at his phone and he has it locked. Which means he is smarter than Sam Keating, because like... Sam never locked his phone. See where that got him? Lock your phones, idiots.

Connor and Oliver are in their apartment. Oliver made a list about the bad things Connor could have done that was felony-worthy. I bet he doesn't even have what actually happened on the list! Connor is like, "nbd", and they make use of the 10 minutes they have in the morning and have sex.



Laurel, Wes, Michaela, and Connor are disputing about that damn suitcase and Rebecca. Annalise tells them to sit the fuck down. She calls on Asher.

Flashback to the scene where Annalise is showing the video of Bonnie and her dad to Asher. Asher is thinking about what he's going to do and he's crying. Annalise gets him to decide that he's not going to testify. Then he says that there's a really bad thing he did.

Bonnie and Annalise are in the office. See, Asher was told not to tell Bonnie about the video. So Bonnie doesn't think that that has anything about him. Annalise isn't upset with Bonnie.
i don't have a good caption for this. like always

Asher comes out into the office and says that Wes and the Accomplices have no clue what's going on. Laurel goes, "o rly".

Annalise and Emily are arguing. Annalise knows that's she's better than her, so she just scoffs about Emily thinking she's going to win the Catherine and Caleb case.

Annalise is lecturing Keating 5 and Bonnie is on the phone with a woman. Bonnie keeps saying it's urgent.


Annalise eventually takes it, and the woman says that Steven (presumably her husband) came after her with a bottle. She killed him. Annalise gives the, "Not this shit again," look and we cut to commercials.

Annalise is trying to help new client Jill. She asks every single question in the book that would make it alright to kill your husband.

Bonnie and Asher are talking. Asher makes a joke about Caleb and Catherine being dead- TOO SOON. TOO FUCKING SOON. I MEAN, I KNOW IT HAPPENED IN THE FUTURE BUT... TOO SOON. IN THE PAST. Anyways, they make awkward conversation.


Annalise goes to Jill's house after telling her to call the police. Annalise points out all the mistakes the police are making while looking through everything.

Asher ignores a call from his dad when he goes to the mansion. Michaela talks about the racist aunt. And then Asher gets mocked by Michaela and Caleb.

Her client, Jill, is transgender. The police think that she killed her husband because he found out that she is transgender. Which is something that Annalise could probably help her with, but then Jill says, "You'll be next if you bring that up." Come on, keep your thoughts of murder in your head! Annalise even told you to keep quiet!



Annalise is interrogating Jill. She asks if her husband knew. Jill says yes, and then she says that her husband really had been beating her. She just exaggerated a bit. Jill brings up that if she is found guilty, she could be send to a male prison. Annalise sees this as a good reason to help her.

Wes calls Nate and Nate basically says, "Hey, fuck you. Go hang out with Levi."

Connor tries to set Michaela up with Caleb again. Laurel says that Caleb isn't innocent. They get in an argument over who is innocent, but you know what?


They should have been paying attention, because Catherine was audio recording everything on her iPad.

Frank comes in to Annalise's office after she gets done scolding Keating 5 for being so damn idiotic. Come on, check everyone's iPads! They might be ready to harvest new supplies on SimCity! Every second counts! Frank says that Nate's wife died.

Did Nate give his wife the pills? Did Frank?

Annalise goes to Nate's apartment and gives him a peach cobbler. It's really upsetting, but I don't completely trust Nate. Or Frank. I kind of predicted she was going to die, but still. So many deaths it's  like we're watching The Grim Reaper Tales: All Deaths on YouTube or some shit.

Wes suggests that they find out who Caleb and Catherine's birth parents. Michaela is sensitive about the topic and tells Wes everything that's wrong with their fucked up lives is because of him. Wrong! Wes has 75% of what to do with it. Only 75% of it. 50% of it had to do with killing Sam. 15% of it had to do with Rebecca because everyone was so involved in their relationship. 10% of it was Levi. The other 25% is their own shit.

Laurel and Wes go to Frank and just ask him if he murdered Rebecca. All casually. Like, wtf?


Someone is there to talk to Bonnie.

Annalise is still interrogating Jill. Jill says she's good at hiding all the abuse.

Annalise wants to drop the charges because this is a complete hate crime. They have phone records between Jill and Annalise, so they could charge Annalise with being an accessory after the fact.

Bonnie says there's no way they could charge her. Annalise brings up the phone calls. Asher bursts in and says a reporter called him about Tiffany/Trotter Lake.

One question: do these people just answer everyone who fucking calls them? I can't remember the last time I picked up some random number without having a general idea of who it was.

Annalise demands that Bonnie finds out all the dirt against Daddy Doucheface.

Annalise gives the prosecutor involved with the Jill case all the information against Daddy Doucheface to get the charges against Jill dropped.


Annalise and Jill hold hands and Jill says that she's glad her husband is dead. Annalise says she's glad Sam's dead too. Yay for bonding over murdering your husbands together! Annalise says something that tugs at the heartstrings. She says, "Now you can finally be the woman you were meant to be." Don't do this to me, HTGAWM! Don't make me cry over murderers!


Oliver is looking up all the adoption information at Annalise's house. Oh fuck no.

Aunt Helan (the racist, dead aunt) had a secret baby. Annalise brings up that secret baby cousin could have framed them. Of course Racist Aunt had a secret baby. That's exactly what all Racist Aunts have- even mine. I'm joking, My Racist Aunt!

Michaela and Caleb flirt a little bit and it's just.. I want Michaela to date everyone and love herself. Is that fine? No? Sorry.


Nate says that Annalise stole all the time he had with his wife after he pinned murder on him. He says he doesn't care Nate says that he gave Nia the pills because he loved her. I FUCKING KNEW IT.

Annalise sobs outside the door.

Wes comes by and sees her.

Laurel and Frank are walking together. Frank gets upset with her when she accuses him of murder. Which is funny because he is literally a murderer.
basically


Frank took her to go see where she came from.


Wes is doing the famous walk up to his apartment with his bike while some music that isn't the beloved IAMX plays.

Wes accuses Annalise of murdering Rebecca. This leads into a huge scene that really shows how much Alfie has improved as an actor overall- I mean, just compare this to him arguing last season. She brings up his mother and Wes says she's nothing like his mother.


Just as I was thinking about Trotter Lake, Asher and Daddy Doucheface argue. Daddy Doucheface knows they opened investigation up on him. Papa Doucheface says that Asher has to gtfo out of his life because he has 99 problems, but a son who goes behind his back just ain't gonna be one.

Paris Geller is in the garage with Emily. Emily says she gives up, because she can't beat Keating 5 and Annalise and the two murderous misfits. But Emily has a bit of a surprise. You wanna know what happened at Trotter Lake? Gang rape. Which is fucking horrible.

Oliver and Connor are in their apartment and Oliver says he did something bad. He hacked into Phillip's (Racist Aunt's baby) computer. What has me facepalming is that Oliver doesn't have a fucking sticky note on his webcam. Are you fucking serious?!??!??!?!? So guess who is watching? It's not Frank laughing his ass off while drinking Budweiser (I would be a lot less worried then) but Phillip is watching. And he looks like a fucking murderer. Oliver, honey, please... Now he knows that there's two gay men nearby checking out his ass. Do you know how bad this is? Fuck, they're two gays in Philly!


In the flashforward, Frank is disposing of Catherine's body. The police finds it. Catherine wakes up! She isn't dead! Yes, not another Rebecca! Now that we know her fate, what about all these other people?
i just realized that this is a pretty accurate picture of what watching any of shonda's shows are like. your heart is on a constant roller coaster of fuckery

Predictions I got right:

  • Nia died. Sad. Connor is probably going to get murdered after Oliver. Or hopefully Frank finds Oliver so cool that he protects him and kills the guy beforehand. Which would be a much nicer outcome. 
  • God damn it, no Levi in jail scenes. 
  • Yeah, Oliver got involved with Annalise's shit, and now he has someone probably wanting to murder him. Phillip is such a creepy murderer name. Just like Frank is a hitman name. 
  • Laurel was getting suspicious of Frank...
  • IT DID HAVE SOMETHING TO DO WITH OLIVER. GOD FUCKING DAMN IT. Maybe Emily also had something to do with it. Maybe she told him to do it...
  • Ooh boy. We still don't know. Thank God Catherine is alive because I love Amy Okuda to death.
  • I got the rape part right. Just not the gang rape part. It's really fucked up and I agree with Pete- anyone who isn't disgusted is an awful person. 


10/22/2015

How To Get Away With Murder 2x05: "Meet Bonnie" RECAP (AKA the one where people declare love for people in weird ways)


Oooh boy.
Previously on HTGAWM:


  • Annalise caught Nate and Wes communicating. Obviously, there's going to be some shit that goes down because of this. I predict that she starts off by saying, "I am protecting you," to either of them. Which, yeah, she is protecting them, but is there a way to protect them that doesn't require... pinning murder on Nate? 
  • Rebecca is buried in a cemetery. 
  • We still don't know what happened with Asher and Tiffany at Trotter Lake. Nor do we know about what happened with Bonnie. 
  • But we did find out a little bit about one character! Michaela was adopted! And she's totally interested in Caleb the adopted parent killer. 
  • Connor was mouthing off about Annalise last episode. I'm praying this doesn't lead to his demise, because I like Connor. 
  • Still no sign of Eve. 
  • Annalise almost killed her ex-boyfriend's she pinned the murder of her dead husband on (who was actually murdered by her law student she has an ambiguous relationship with) wife. The fact I even had to type that sentence just proves how confusing the world could be. 
  • Oh yeah, I almost forgot that Bonnie confessed to murder to Asher. 

Predictions that I kind of hope I'm either wrong or right about:

  • So we learn about Bonnie this episode, right? I'm going to copy and paste my predictions from last episode relating to her. "Bonnie. This should be the episode with her flashback, right? Maybe she came from a religious cult or an abusive relationship or family. I think Sam has something to do with it. Hear me out, okay? Sam was a therapist. Maybe he heard her story and felt like he had to do something. But Annalise was the hand that pulled her up from the darkness, so that's why Bonnie thinks it's all due to Annalise. Maybe Bonnie doesn't know that Sam had more to do with it, but Annalise thinks she does. Also, perhaps Bonnie actually killed someone in her past. She was talking to Rebecca about killing girls, and Rebecca said she herself didn't kill any girls, but maybe Bonnie was not referring to Rebecca. Maybe she was really referring to herself. "
  • I suspect that Bonnie is getting arrested this episode. I mean, she confessed that she murdered Sam. That wasn't even who she fucking murdered, though! God, Paris!
  • I really don't want bad things to happen to Connor (and I guess Wes) or Nate, 'cause they're just for the most part trying to live their lives. But they crossed a line with Annalise. 
  • I still think that Tiffany girl from Trotter Lake died from some fucking lame frat party. People have theories that she got pregnant, so that's why I'm just throwing that out there. 
  • I always pronounce Levi as Le-vee in my head. He's always going to be Levee in my mind. Levee fucks up and crosses a line with Michaela this episode and BFF Connor tells him off even though Connor would totally have sex with him if Oliver was out of the picture. Which we love Oliver in the picture, so let's always keep him in the picture. 
  • Annalise eats some more yogurt or ice cream this episode. It's recurring symbolism, the whole food eating stuff. I mean, the symbolism is that Annalise Keating is fucking amazing, but who said symbolism has to have a deep meaning?
  • I suspect that Wes is going to become more likable soon. I mean, he was a little less unbearable last week than he was the last few episodes last week. 
  • Connor and Oliver will probably do something cute or adorable this episode. Or they might repeat 2x02. I don't even know with these two anymore. I just want them to be alive. 
  • I still think those adopted twins are doing inappropriate things. Like, what if Caleb is one of those brothers that touches the inside of her thigh? What if they randomly kiss in the bathroom if one of them is too stressed out? I still think that there's something going on with them and they need to chill out. 
  • Who has sex this episode? Not Bonnie, since y'know, arrested. Not Asher. Not Wes (unless Levee is up for the challenge) or Michaela. Annalise has too many of her potential lovers forming alliances against her, and Eve is nowhere to be found. Maybe they'll say something about Connor and Oliver having sex, but they won't get an actual scene? Frank and Laurel are totally going to get naked this episode and have weird drunken awkward sex. 
I have a feeling that this is going to be a really intense episode, and I'm super excited. The last few episodes haven't had many " :o " moments (in my opinion) compared to last season, but I really am hoping that this is the one.

I've been so stressed out and anxious as of lately. I just need a great episode of HTGAWM.

Flashforward!

Someone is running away in the house. It's Bonnie! Maybe she isn't arrested! Bonnie goes into a car. Asher is there, panicking.

Asher is in court in the present, in deep thought.

Back to Bonnie and Asher, Bonnie is talking about why she murdered Sam. Except she didn't. She says that Sam was trying to rape her. She says she hit him with a lamp, killing him.



Back in court, Asher runs out.

Bonnie is in Annalise's office. Frank is there.

Michaela, Laurel, and Wes are outside the door, panicking. Connor comes out and says that their lives are owned by Annalise now, so they might as well drink a beer or two and relax.

Bonnie gets a phone call. It was about the Hapstall case. Annalise sighs, relieved.

Asher comes in, angry. He threatens to break Frank's face. Annalise lets him in and Asher wants Bonnie out.

Michaela and Laurel get upset with Frank for not telling what's going on with Asher. He says that they have an eye on him, just like the rest of them. BRING UP THE DATING SITE, FRANK!

Annalise says that Bonnie did actually murder Sam to Asher. She starts talking about how women are never taken seriously when they're raped. Then, she tells Asher that if he testifies to what he knows, Annalise and Bonnie are going to go to jail.


Asher goes back to Emily Sinclair and his father. He says he knows who killed Sam. Are you fucking kidding me, Asher? Seriously? Why can't you enjoy the bonding powers of lying about murder?

And... commercials.

Asher's dad yells at him because he withheld evidence. Emily asks what's happened and who murdered Sam.

See, Emily can't Annalise. She's not going to win anything by pure luck.

Keating Four are talking. They're talking about orgies. Jesus fuck, okay. They've been drinking. Connor tells Wes that he needs to be in it, because penis balances are important. We learn that Connor wants to know what Wes has to offer, and Michaela kind of likes Frank's beard. I'm sure you would love to know about his hitman status, too, Michaela!

Convo of the week happened here:

C: Would you like to go to jail without having an orgasm?
M: And you're going to help me with that?
C: I might give it a shot.
L: Back off, she's mine.


squad goals


Annalise tells them what to do with the case of the Hapstall's, which I'm not paying attention to. At all.

Bonnie and Asher are talking in the car. He says that he hasn't said anything to Emily. Bonnie says the other students didn't know shit. He asks if the only reason Bonnie slept with him the first time was for an alibi. Bonnie says that yes, that's how they did start, but that's not how she feels now.

It's kind of sad, but... Bonnie.... you're a fucking liar.

Frank brings in phone records to Annalise. Frank talks about how Wes continuously calls Levee. Which is grounds to be suspicious of him.

Michaela is currently having dirty phone talk with Levee. Annalise takes her phone, but when the camera turns back around, it still looks like she has the phone in her shirt. Oops. Goofs happen to the best of us.

Annalise is in the car. Nate comes in.

Annalise starts telling him about Nia. She says she lied. And then she says that Nia kind of wanted her to... y'know, off her. Annalise says she's telling him this because she doesn't want anymore secrets between them. They hold hands and Nate says thanks.

"forgive me for making your life an utter hell"
"why'd you do it"
"for my law student"


Frank goes into the basement. Laurel is there.

F: What's wrong?
L: Nothing.

Then they kiss and shit.

Laurel takes off her pants and then her underwear.

This is probably one of the more intense sex scenes on there. I kind of hope Bonnie walks in. I don't know why, I just do, y'know?



Bonnie walks in and Connor, Wes and Michaela are there. Bonnie asks where Annalise is, and Connor and Wes start sassing her. WRONG! YOU DO NOT SASS PARIS GELLER. She will literally kill you. Literally.

Michaela pulls up a video that proves the parent killer's aunt is racist. Caleb walks in and gets upset.

Back to Asher. He's about to sign some papers. Asher brings up the David Allen case, and says that he should admit to what he did. His dad gets mad at him and Asher leaves in tears. Uh... did Asher just say he had a kid?

I mean, he could have just meant his dad isn't protecting his kid (Asher) but... I don't know, I hear shit sometimes. It's ridiculous.

Back at Annalise's, they're watching the video. Laurel comes in and everyone knows she just had her own version of D-Day.

Michaela, Connor, and Oliver are there. Oliver asks if he would get paid for this stuff. Connor says he doesn't want to work for Annalise. I agree. Michaela agrees. Connor says that he might get arrested and then he says he loves Oliver.

"what's wrong with you?"
"murder. nbd ily"


Asher and Emily are in a bar. Emily pressures him to tell about Sam.

Oliver managed to get the rest of the audio of the parent killer's aunt. It goes on, and she says that she wasn't sure if she heard anything. Then she calls the adopted kids half-breeds.

The judge is going to investigate about how the audio was obtained. Oh fucking no. Protect Oliver. Protect him. He's innocent and needs a shield from the bullshit.



Catherine yells in court about how the judge should understand the racist aunt is a bad person, because she's black.

Levee and Wes go to the cemetery. Levee talks to Bruno and pulls out a gun. What the fuck, Levi? Dean Thomas kind of has that same, "WTF???" look on his face. Dean/Wes intervenes and says nobody is getting shot, because Harry Potter is not this fucking dark. Wes just wants to know what Bruno knows. Then nobody gets shot and we can all go back to eating cereal at midnight.

i saved this as "nbd lol i just have a gun"


I'm so, so worried. About everyone. Jesus fuck.

Wes walks into the courtroom. They ask if Wes brought the drugs. Michaela walks in and pressures Bonnie to tell her what they know.

Annalise explodes on them and tells them all that Asher was going to testify against all of them.


Wes thinks about stealing some keys.

Bruno tells Wes that he just gave access to the storage locker.

Annalise starts to panic about the studets being nosy.

Wes doesn't get to steal the keys, because Frank takes them. It's kind of like a cheating spouse and their cell phone. Don't leave it lying around, you fucking idiot. Annalise calls Wes into her office.

Laurel, Connor, and Michaela start to team up against Wes. Or rather, plot to.

Annalise goes into Nate's apartment and panics about Sam.

Levi and Wes are outside. Michaela, Laurel, and Connor come out of a car and Michaela starts screaming. She assumes that Wes and Levee were gay for each other. It's.. really fucked up when that's your first thought, Michaela.


Nate is pissed that he took the fall for Bonnie. Annalise says she would die instead of hurting him again, because she hates what she did, and she hates herself.

You know your life is fucked up when you see a cop car come by and assume that you're going to be arrested. Luckily, Michaela, Laurel, Connor, and Wes aren't getting arrested this time around. Wes has the key though! I repeat: Wes has the key!

LEVEL UP!


The cops come by and take Levi in because he has meth in his trunk. Levi screams that he was set up, but what I learned from criminal justice in junior year was 1.) everyone says that and 2.) nobody believes it.

Bonnie and Asher are in a bar together. Bonnie says that she made a mistake. Paris/Bonnie starts to cry. She tells him that she's not the only one who will go down for this if he testifies. They say that they love each other. Asher walks away, and we know he's going to testify.

Bonnie goes to her car and starts to sob to Annalise. Bonnie says that she is stupid for telling him and that he's going to testify.


Wes, Laurel, Michaela and Connor find the place where Rebecca's dead body is. Laurel and Connor don't want to see a dead body. Which I really can't blame them for. Connor should have a normal life and Laurel should do whatever the hell she wants. But the Connor thing isn't going to happen. So, uh, Laurel....



Annalise comes into Asher's apartment and takes a flashdrive. She tells him to sit down.

Wes opens up the bag and finds money instead of Rebecca's dead body.

Frank put in the meth in Levi's car.

Michaela and Connor are pissed about being taken there. Laurel and Wes's brotp is over, too. Disappointing.

Annalise and Asher are watching a video from Bonnie's childhood. It's a video of Bonnie and her father. He molested her.

Oh my god. I'm going to cry. I'm going to fucking cry. I love Bonnie so much. Protect this murderous lawyer.

Flashforward,



Bonnie stops the car to pee. She goes into a bathroom and scrubs blood off herself. What the hell? What the absolute hell? She still looks better than me on a night of a murder.

Asher left the car in the flashforward. He went to the police.

My predictions: 

  • Bonnie did come from an abusive background. We don't know about the rest of that, though.
  • Bonnie didn't get arrested. That was Levee. 
  • Bad things happen when you tell your boyfriend you've recently entered a boring, domesticated relationship with that there's a slight possibility you could be getting arrested. I mean, what the fuck, Connor? Oliver seems so normal. And yet you're going to involve him in this bullshit. I think Wes is safe for now, and so is Nate. 
  • I think my theory about Asher might be a little bit wrong. I don't know anymore. 
  • Connor did start to tell Levee off, but then the whole 'arrested' thing happened. Oops. Why did I think it was Bonnie who was getting arrested? Oh yeah, because she confessed to murder to her blabbermouth boyfriend. 
  • I don't remember Annalise eating anything this episode. Oops. 
  • Wes is a little bit more bearable. I guess. He protected Bruno so it's fine. He's fine. Okay. Whatever. 
  • Connor said, "I love you," which is a big ol' fucking deal. 
  • Frank and Laurel had sex. I can't take them seriously because of the word, "Flaurel" like wtf even is that. Flaurel. Have you ever pronounced it out loud. 

10/18/2015

Iced Coffee on an Autumn Day Where It's Too Cold to Drink It


I started watching The Guild  when I should probably be asleep. But hey! Screw sleep. I got through 2 entire seasons. 

Recently, it's been hard for me to write personal posts. It's because my life has been like that one game where you roll stuff back and forth rapidly. What is that called? I don't even know what that's called. Does it even have a name or is it just so universally considered so stupid it doesn't even get a name?

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I feel great one day, and then another day, I want to come home and ball my eyes out over a bunch of nonexistent ice cream.

I have stuff sorted out in categories from bad to good in my life right now.

The bad stuff:

  1. I left my environmental science book on Thursday and now I cannot do my assignment.
  2. I am still a nervous wreck about 99.9% things on this Earth.
  3. I have to retake my ACT
  4. I have to study for my ACT. Doing this makes me have a breakdown that ends up with tears. Try to explain this to someone. They don't understand. I stop studying because nobody will fucking listen to me. 
  5. My chest hurts. Where I'm from, unless you're pregnant or someone you're related to is a nurse, good luck going to a doctor. And guess what I constantly think about? Not a good combination.
  6. That one feeling in the back of my mind where I realize I'm never going to be able to live that one (really fun to me) boring life, where all of the careers I want are careers that are financially stable careers that will pay enough money so that I'll have routine medical care I never got in my childhood due to the fact nobody in my life was financially stable. So that need for stability but need for having a job I don't totally fucking hate is a real need. 

The good stuff:

  1. There's a lot of time left before number 6 becomes a legit concern. Kinda. 
  2. I have a C in math analysis!
  3. I found a college that will accept my ACT score that will take my college credits I have. I mean, it's a second choice (or third... or fourth...) but it's still going to accept my credits. So that long weekend I spent drinking iced coffee doing a hundred Excel assignments wasn't totally pointless.
  4. I have stuff to recap every Thursday!
  5. It's cold out!

10/16/2015

How To Get Away With Murder RECAP 2x04- Skanks Get Shanked


Last episode, a few things happened:

  • We find out that Nate calls Annalise the night she gets shot. Nate makes Wes, Connor, Michaela, and Laurel get into the car when he comes by.
  • Rebecca is Eggs. Levi thinks she's dead because she was talking about how bad things were. Wes and Levi kind of formed an alliance.
  • Michaela and Levi are kind of cute (better than IRRELEVANT and Michaela) but it sucks because he's using her to figure out where his foster sister is.
  • There's something really, really bad about Asher. He's covering something up about a girl named Tiffany and he had his dad help him with it. So that one episode where we all sympathized with him after his dad kicked him out of the family? Means nothing. Dead to me.
  •  Speaking of Asher, Bonnie and him broke up. 
  • Also, Asher worked with Emily St Clair or Sinclair or whatever.
  • Oh yeah, Nate and Wes are teaming up against Annalise. 


Predictions (that I'm probably totally wrong about):

  • Bonnie. This should be the episode with her flashback, right? Maybe she came from a religious cult or an abusive relationship or family. I think Sam has something to do with it. Hear me out, okay? Sam was a therapist. Maybe he heard her story and felt like he had to do something. But Annalise was the hand that pulled her up from the darkness, so that's why Bonnie thinks it's all due to Annalise. Maybe Bonnie doesn't know that Sam had more to do with it, but Annalise thinks she does. Also, perhaps Bonnie actually killed someone in her past. She was talking to Rebecca about killing girls, and Rebecca said she herself didn't kill any girls, but maybe Bonnie was not referring to Rebecca. Maybe she was really referring to herself. 
  • Asher's a frat boy at heart. I think I know where this is going. Tiffany could have been a girl at some lame party who died there. His dad covered it up. Emily knows about it.
  • Wes is probably going to continue being lame. Sorry, I kind of hate him. It's... I can't help it this season.
  • You know what? I'm going to guess what happened on the night Emily died/Annalise got shot. So you know how Nate calls her? Maybe that's just to establish an alibi, because he knows exactly what happened but wants to make it look like he's innocent. There's got to be a reason Wes and Nate have teamed up together that leads to this happening in the future. The whole thing that's ?????? about this theory is why Michaela, Laurel, and Connor would be involved, but I feel as if Wes doesn't really need them anymore so he's totally okay with going to prison and taking the others down with him. Did that show a bit of my hatred for Wes? Okay, moving on.
  • Still, what's Eve got to do with any of this? There's got to be more to her character than just Jean Grey kissing Amanda Walker (as nice as that is- it's still not enough to make her a fully developed character) and I want to knowwwww. She has to have something to do with Murder/Shooting Night.
  • Emily was murdered by the same person who killed Catherine and Caleb's aunt. Don't think I'm crazy, okay?! Listen, there was a reason the aunt got murdered. Maybe she was too much proof against them. And Emily was also too much proof against them. So how do you delete proof? 
  • Who is going to sleep with who this episode? Hm, I don't think it'll be Connor and Oliver. I feel like Connor is probably reading The Velvet Rage while trying to figure out why being in love makes him feel so insecure. I feel like the writers really, really, really, really like the sexual tension between Laurel and Frank, so it'll last a few more episodes. Probably before the whole midseason finale. Annalise and Wes is a possibility.... Maybe Eve will come back and save us from that torture. I really don't want to see that shit. That means I might actually have to like Wes this season if he sleeps with Annalise. Michaela and Levi would be the best option.
At the flashforward, ambulances are there people are trying to revive Annalise. The students are looking guilty as hell in the car. Which they rightfully should feel a little fucking guilty- after all, Annalise tried her best to defend them after Wes murdered her husband.

The students and Nate are listening to the police radio. Michaela gets a phone call and they argue over answering it. Michaela answers it in a really cheerful tone saying everything is fine.

4 weeks earlier, Annalise is in the bath and gets a phone call from Nate. Jeez, I'm glad that I'm not the only one who leaves my expensive phone on the side of the bath. I'm glad this show makes me feel more confident about my decisions in life.


Nia (Nate's dying wife) calls Annalise.

Annalise goes to the hospital to see her side bae's dying wife.


Nia is pretty understanding. If I was dying, I'd be pissed if my wife was spending all this time with someone else.

Nia does what alt!Chloe does in episode 4 and asks for Annalise to kill her.

Speaking of Life is Strange spoilers, the case this week has a girl named Rachel involved. And guess what? Rachel got fucking murdered.

Sometimes, you can't escape the crazy of fictional worlds.

Rachel started talking to Molly or Megan's boyfriend and they took her into the woods. I don't.. what kind of horror film shit is this?

So, basically, Molly and Megan involved Zoey in this bullshit.
this is zoey. she looks so innocent. she's probably not.


In the woods, Rachel got stabbed 52 times.

Michaela and Laurel are being judgmental to all the girls in this case. Which is the same thing I want to do. Connor tells them to stop Mean Girling and he starts to complain about Annalise.

Wes says the Keating 5 is like a mob, so you can't get out of it when Michaela suggests to quit.

There's only three people working the case, because Asher didn't show up, and Michaela has to prep Caleb and Catherine for trial.

Annalise talks to Michaela, which is all I ever really wanted (which is a lie- I want a lot of shit from this show. But one of my priority wants is Michaela and Annalise to actually interact. My top priority is none of the characters I like dying)

Annalise calls her smart, and Michaela says thank- and then Annalise interrupts her to say that she has boobs, which are obviously tempting to any guy screwing his adopted sister.
notice me senpai


Bonnie calls Asher to see what's up with his mess, and Asher pretends to be sick. Since tonight is Mean Girls night, Bonnie bascally says, "Boo, you whore!" and hangs up.

Asher's dad is there to protect him and make a deal. You know what? I don't like this.

Michaela calls Levi. Levi is in Wes's apartment, looking at the scratches and wondering what kind of crazy rabbit sex Wes had for those marks to be there. Levi, honey, that's not what happened.

Okay, I'm just making shit up now. He's too focused on talking dirty to Michaela.
"talk dirty to me at work michaela haha i'm the new fuckboy of htgawm"


Michaela says, "SPANK ME DADDY" to him loudly. Caleb comes up behind her and asks if she's really a lawyer.

Annalise is too busy thinking about Nia's request to focus in the courtroom. Nia pressures her to kill her, again and again. Annalise tries to tell her no. Nia continues to beg. She says Annalise owes her this.

Annalise wasn't focusing in court and everyone notices it.

Annalise says to Frank that she needs help.. oh no. He's going to kill Nia, isn't he?

Levi calls to insult Wes's apartment, and Wes says that he can't insult the apartment when he sleeps in a car.

Levi wants to get involved in the Nate x Wes alliance so bad.

Laurel found out that the doctor gave the wrong diagnoses to another client before. They use this in court to make Zoey seem innocent.

Connor isn't impressed.
Enjoy all the sex you can while you're still alive, asshole.


Laurel tries being the jelly to the peanut butter and bread sandwich and soothe out the whole uprising against Annalise.

Molly and Megan call Zoey a slut. Connor helps out and says that he knows what it's like to have people get inside people's heads.

Wes goes to the hospital with Nate. Nate says he can't be here.

Frank made three calls the night Rebecca disappeared. One of them was to a girl called Sabrina. Was this the one girl who he had a long distance relationship with?

Wes tells Levi, and Levi says something that Connor has said before. "I'll be good."

Michaela is prepping Caleb. Caleb says his story, and how he was a 6 year old that was adopted when everyone else wanted to adopt little white babies. And now everyone thinks he killed his parents because he looks different from them. Michaela says he's playing the victim, and Caleb says she's being bitchy.


Caleb says she doesn't know how it is, and Michaela drops the truth bomb and says that she was adopted to people she couldn't relate to.

Caleb says it's bull, because she was never accused of murder.

Catherine walks in and asks if everything is okay.

Back in court, we learn that Molly takes the stand tomorrow.

Bonbon (not my chosen nickname) calls Asher. Asher's dad is trying to prove that Annalise is a criminal.


Bonnie wants to know if she can get Frank's person to trace Asher's phone calls. Frank says no, until Bonnie brings up that Laurel said some stuff about Frank over drinks the other day. Really, nobody ever grows up. We're all worried about the people we're having sex with's opinions on us.

Laurel is talking in Spanish, and I can't understand any of it because I got a D in Spanish 2. No hate, I just don't understand it.

Michaela says that she doesn't think Caleb is screwing his sister. After they talk about relationship drama, Wes figures out Levi and Michaela are still talking.

Wes tells Levi to gtfo.

dean thomas's life has become a lot more stressful after law school


Laurel stole Zoey's phone. She goes to Frank. Hidden apps on Zoey's phone reveals a video that they're using to plan to stab people. I'm just... I'm so done with these girls. Fuck this case.

This season, it seems like none of Annalise's clients have any morals whatsoever.

Connor is pissed that they're going to bury the video.

Annalise tells Connor to stop being so sensitive. It's still.. really fucked up??? What the fuck.

Frank got pills for Annalise.

Catherine asks Michaela has a crush on Caleb. Which is weird.
"i'm just... i'm just asking for a friend"


Molly says she felt bullied by Zoey. Zoey and Molly exchange, "u crazy bitch i hate you" after Molly says she has before. The videos are put into evidence and Annalise hates her life once again.

Nate comes to see Annalise after Zoey's parents complain that she sucks. Nate asks why she was talking to Nia.

Nia continues to beg for death. Annalise is conflicted. She says she's not going to promise anything.

Annalise tells Nate that Nia is worried about him, instead of, well, you know, her wanting Annalise to actually kill her.

Annalise is watching the videos. In the video, the crazy bitches say, "Skanks get shanked". In the course of 2 minutes, this is replayed multipe times. It's kind of like the new, "He did things to my ass that made my eyes water" now.
used this screenshot so i didn't have to show the girls faces. tainting my blog n shit.


Annalise argues in court that Zoey liked to do whatever Molly did. Because she was afraid of her.

Man, this is a bunch of clique-ish drama bullshit. I'm glad I was never popular in high school or middle school. Or grade school. Even in preschool, bitches were hating on me.

Zoey gets arrested after bitching Molly out in court and says her plans on killing her.

Connor slipped the video. Which means Connor is probably going to get murdered. Which sucks, because I love Connor.

Connor starts talking about his emotional stress. Annalise starts to talk about Connor's car. She helped destroy it so they wouldn't get caught. Annalise tells him not to fuck with her or any of her cases again.



Michaela comes in before her newfound friend Connor (as of season 2) gets murdered by his boss. Michaela says Catherine is a virgin. Annalise says, "Finally, something we can use."

Catherine agrees to use it in court to throw out the incest rumors.  You can still be kissing your brother! Doesn't make it any better!

Michaela is staring at Caleb. Annalise tells her to use her boobs, not her heart. Annalise also puts her arms around Michaela. Awwwwwwww. Please don't kill Connor and I'll be okay. If you kill Connor, this Michaela and Annalise stuff means nothing to me. And don't kill Michaela! I'll give you Asher, Annalise.

Wes and Levi are talking in the car together. Frank needed help disposing the body. Wes goes to the cemetery where Rebecca was buried. One of Frank's friends works there.


Annalise takes the pills out of her pocket and puts them back in. She's back in the hospital, where Nia is reading.

Annalise reveals that she thinks about killing herself a lot to Nia. She says that if she doesn't deserve to die, Nia certainly doesn't. She says that life is about feeling alone in the pain.

Nia thought she would do it, because she killed before.

Annalise says she's not the woman she thinks she was, and then leaves.

Back to the Holy Trinity of Bitches I Don't Like, Emily Sinclair (or St Clair), Asher, and Asher's dad are talking about signing a deal. Asher looks like he's upset. Asher hugs his dad.

I don't know what music they're playing during this mess, but it's not IAMX. Which disappoints me.

Bonnie finds him and asks why Asher is doing this. Asher thinks that Annalise actually got Nate to murder Sam. Silly Asher! If Nate did murder someone, he wouldn't have that Flat Character Tv Trope under his name on HTGAWM'S TV tropes page.

Bonnie says that he's wrong. She says that she killed Sam. Asher just goes, "what."


Wes knows where Rebecca's body is. Wes tells Nate.

Annalise sees Nate and Wes talking outside of the hospital. Honestly, what the fuck is this mess?

In the flashforward, the students are pitying their lives. Nate says it's going to be okay. Michaela has to do something. Wow, what character development. Michaela learned how to function during a horrible crime.

Michaela goes into an apartment. Apartment 34. There's a guy there. Caleb. Caleb asks how is she. Who the fuck is she?!?! Catherine??!??!?! Annalise??!??!?!??!?!?!?!??!??!?!?!?!?!?!?



Predictions I got right: 

  • lol none bc none of it came up.
  • i mean i guess michaela and levi were close this episode but did they have sex?? noooooo


10/09/2015

How To Get Away With Murder RECAP: It's Called The Octopus 2x03


I'm so, so very excited for this episode. I'm more enthusiastic than 3!OH3 when they're having a house party.


  • Last episode, Annalise was cross-examined and Eve made it seem like her Lady Friend murdered Sam to save Nate. Annalise and Eve had sex and the morning after Eve wanted her to consider moving to New York. Of course, this conversation took place on the porch of Annalise's house (which was a bad idea considering Eve said that they didn't really know each other that bad) and Nate saw them kissing. And no, it's not going to turn into a threesome, because Nate knows what kind of crazy Annalise can bring you in if you have sex with her. That's what Nikole thought.
  • Connor and Michaela met Levi, and Connor instantly tried using his newfound bond with Michaela to get her to have sex with Levi. Of course, since no characters can have something good in their lives Wes finds a picture of Levi and Rebecca together, so it's a common theory that Levi=Eggs 911. 
  • Connor told the group that Oliver has HIV so Asher wouldn't suspect anything. Which was dumb because I think you could practically rob a bank in front of Asher and he wouldn't suspect anything. Oliver came by and Asher asked him how it felt to be dying from HIV. Oliver was obviously pissed off about Connor telling people about that when he hasn't even told his parents. All was okay though, because Michaela and Oliver bonded over wine while teasing Connor. Also, we found out that Oliver caught HIV after Connor slept with lameass Paxton and he doesn't know who he caught it from because he was so drunk. Connor blames himself.
  • I can't remember what the fuck happened to Wes last episode. I know he talked to Catherine but honestly? I stopped caring about Wes. I think I only liked him for his girlfriend. 
  • Frank has a butter story that probably has nothing to do with this. Also, if Laurel wants to be his lover, she has to get to know him. 
  • Bonnie and Annalise had some big scene about how Annalise saved her. We don't know from what, but if it was from the Westboro Baptist Church, I'll love Annalise even more. I feel like Bonnie could possibly be one of those girls who had a family heavily involved in church. Anything is possible in this show.
  • We actually have a murder to follow this season! Emily St. Clair or Sinclair or something. She got murdered in Caleb and Catherine's mansion. Everyone was rooting for her to die, so it's not like anyone is in tears about this revelation. 
  • Connor had to be convinced in the flashforwards to leave Annalise. Wes wasn't even trying to help her! Fuck you, Wes! I'd expect this from Laurel or Michaela or Connor, but you? You guys have a Will They or Won't They thing going on!
  • Straight people want Michaela and Connor to get together. What's new?


Predictions I'm almost certain I'm wrong about:

  • Bonnie. Oh, Bonnie! Your life is the most messed up out of all of these characters and I don't even know you. Rory Gilmore would be ashamed of you. I've really been thinking about this girl. All her motivation is tied to Annalise. Annalise rescued her. What did she get rescued from? Maybe it was an abusive family or a relationship. It could be anything. I still think that Bonnie is interested in Annalise, would probably take a bullet for her, (I'm sorry) and also probably die a lot inside if she knew about Eve and Annalise. More than getting rejected than Harvard.
  • I think that either Wes, Bonnie, or Frank is in the cellar when Annalise goes down there. It wouldn't make any sense for any of the other characters to be down there, because none of them are that comfortable with her. If Wes was down there, maybe he was going on a scavenger hunt for his dead girlfriend. If it was Bonnie, maybe she was looking for hope that one day, Annalise might actually like her and stop judging her so harshly. Or maybe the Harvard acceptance letter. Frank might be looking for a girlfriend who wants to get to know the real him, not just the hitman him. Or maybe he didn't know what to do with Rebecca's body, so maybe he's trying to figure out what to do with it.
  • I still don't have much of a guess on who shot Annalise and killed Emily. It's kind of early on, so we don't know motives. I hope it's not Eve or any of the Keating Five. Well, actually, I don't care much about Wes this season. So it could be him. Maybe it's the adopted twins. There's got to be a reason why we found out Emily was working on the case before we saw that flashforward.
  • This isn't much of a prediction, but I really want Frank to say something about Michaela's dating profile. I just want Michaela to have a nice life. I want her to stop being involved in murders and get some nice significant other and become a famous lawyer. However, I know better.
  • Speaking of Michaela, I think there's more to the Eggs 911/Levi thing than just that picture. Seriously, everything in this show is more than just this small reveal. There's got to be more, damn it! Also, again, I want her to have a nice boyfriend or something.
  • Who do I think is going to bump uglies tonight? Well, we already know Michaela is going to have sex with Levi. Or do we? Maybe Connor will get laid. Hopefully by Oliver, since it should be time for the prEP to kick in. I don't think Laurel is going to do the octopus with Frank after last episode. I mean, you have to know your local hitman before having sex with him, gosh, Laurel! I stopped caring about Asher and Bonnie after the first episode. I fear for both of their lives. Annalise doesn't have Eve around and Nate will probably never have sex with her again after the whole, "You pinned murder on me!" thing. And Wes? I stopped caring about Wes. Like, I literally do not give a single fuck about Wes as of right now.
I'm so nervous for this episode. I don't know why. Perhaps it's the noise in the cellar.

In the flashforward Michaela, Connor, Laurel, and Wes are running away from the scene. Annalise is trying to reach for her phone as she's struggling to breathe. Nate is calling her.

Back to the present, Annalise is trying to figure out why Caleb and Catherine killed their parents. She's trying everything! Every possible reason why they would do it. I don't think she mentioned the rubbing uglies thing, though. It's the most likely one, too! Gosh, Annalise! Get your shit together enough that you can be a functioning character on TV dramas!


Annalise is very unenthusiastic this episode. I understand, though! Her lady friend left and it was kind of awkward. Now she has to deal with Nate and Wes and all the other bullshit people bring to her on the daily. And lastly, she has to deal with the parent killers who are rubbing uglies with each other.

Annalise heads down to the cellar after hearing a noise. She turns on the light. Don't you fucking do it Annalise! Don't do it! This is how horror films go! I don't want you to die!

Annalise calls Wes (aka my least favorite as of right now- sorry Wes) to check it out. Apparently, it's suffering. It's just a mouse. That Wes kills with a hammer to put it out of his misery. Which is fucked up. You know who else had a similar death like that? Think about it...

Annalise and Wes talk about feeling lonely. Which is awkward. Don't bang him, Annalise! But do, because I might like Wes more this way. Seriously, I'm not a Wes fan as of right now.


Some boy and Michaela are about to have sex. I think that's Levi? I can't even tell, oops. I don't know anymore. Michaela says no, because she's not a third date kind of girl.

Asher includes some lame pickup line about going to the zoo to have sex with Bonnie/Paris. He makes elephant noises. I can't tell if I find this cute or disgusting. So it's DisCuting. Fuck the English language.

I think I'm always going to be uncertain about what to think of these two. I go back and forth these days. I thought they were kind of cute in season 1, but now I find Bonnie too interesting for him.

Connor makes Oliver breakfast to apologize for being... season 1 Connor and says that there's only one more day until D Day. And no, D Day isn't doomsday, despite what Asher thinks. I feel like Connor probably Googled how to make pancakes. Which makes me hate him because everyone I know burns the pancakes. Why can't we have realistic things on this show?! Connor would burn the pancakes! Don't make me think things as fact but turn out to be wrong, damn it, writers!

He gets perfect pancakes and the promise of sex tomorrow. He's probably going to explode from happiness!

Frank says something to Laurel and says that she's falling for him or something. You know, I kind of... I don't know what to think. I mean, I like Laurel. Kind of? And Frank is shaping up to be something else. I like him better than last season, so maybe I won't hate them so much this season! Positivity. Spread it like peanut butter on a slice of bread.

But it doesn't matter what I think about Flaurel right now! Guess why? Sherri Saum (aka Lena from The Fosters) is in this episode! I missed her face since I got so sick of Brandon and Callie and rage quit The Fosters.

 Sherri's character is being accused of murdering someone with her vagina. That's not the only character on the show who can murder someone with their vagina. Bonnie/Paris, explain what you did with the first Asher, damn it!

Laurel is investigating a preschool teacher about the case. Asher is looking into a construction worker with a big dick. Connor is investigating into a woman who is hitting on him. Wes is interviewing a guy who won't talk about any of it. Michaela is talking to some guy who says something about a sex position called The Octopus.
This is the face of a jealous man.


Bonnie/Paris (aka the first one who murdered someone with their vagina on this show- step off Tonya!) shows Annalise something. It's exactly what I knew it would be! I fucking called it!

Basically, parent killers Catherine and Caleb are being accused of the next Folgers siblings. This is what you get when you're adopted and you're accused with murder! I bet those Folgers siblings murdered their parents after that commercial too!

Keating Five is talking about sex in Annalise's kitchen. Wes says he thinks Catherine is hot and everyone says, "Not again, Dean!" Connor asks who is the best everyone's had in bed. Apparently his was a tutor in physics. Laurel is obviously going to say Frank, because there's something just really sexy- yet messed up- sleeping with a guy like him. Michaela admits she's never had an orgasm in her life.
She's too cute to deal with this shit
(She looks like she's sneezing but really my screenshot program just sucks)


Everyone in the room is ashamed. I bet Connor kind of expected it, though. Deep down, he probably knew Aiden was awful in bed. I mean, we probably know that Connor didn't sleep with him in a bed. Have you noticed that the only guy Connor has had sex with in a bed is Oliver?

Connor takes Michaela to a sex party so she can experience the finer things in life. I'm glad they went from competitive enemies from friends showing each other greater things in life. Michaela makes him stay monogamous, while Connor tries to get her laid! Remember that girl Connor was investigating for Connor's case? She brought her husband. And she's hitting on Michaela. Oh fu-


Michaela was going to let her do it so that she would testify for Tonya. Oh, Michaela. You remind me more of Annalise every single day. Also she would probably let the woman do it for the first orgasm. After hearing the rest of Keating Five talk about orgasms, she wants in on the experience!

Annalise is doing what Annalise does best to Tonya. Tonya did it because she loved him, guys! Tonya killed a man because she loved him! If this character was played by anyone other than Sherri Saum, I'd hate them. Forever.


 Tonya isn't a relationship person. She feel in love with Dominic but there was his wife. She wanted him, though. She gave him drugs that taken with something else can cause a heart attack. She never wanted him to die, but she wanted to show his wife who he is.

Annalise calls Tonya out on her bullshit. She says that she gives people who really like sex a bad name.

Frank is helping Laurel and Laurel does a good impression of making fun of his, "Getting to know him" line. Basically, Frank has had a pretty good life in general. He got kicked out of community college, though. But he doesn't mention the whole killing girls for his boss's husband. That just slips his mind, doesn't it.

Emily Sinclair and Asher are working together. WHAT THE FUCK, ASHER? He's supposed to do it for 'justice'. I hate him now. I really hate him. Emily tries using Trotter Lake against him.
"I could use your dick size against you, but I just don't know it yet..."


Asher broke into Annalise's house with a tape recorder to get evidence against her for Emily. So that mouse thing was a bigger thing than just Wes and Annalise having awkward conversations. Which means he also probably knows about Annalise and Wes being that close.

Asher, I tried to defend your dumbass self in the past, too! What the fuck is wrong with you?!

Annalise says that the charges against Tonya are wrong. It's intentional premeditated murder. Tonya and Bonnie exchange WTF looks. Those looks are increasingly common in this show.

Annalise gets the wife on the stand. She accuses her of killing her husband. Tonya is innocent! Well, not really! Just in the eyes of the public.


The wife cries, but usually when people cry when Annalise makes them cry, they deserve it. This girl, though?

Annalise says that she knows that Tonya killed the poor guy after Tonya vomits in the bathroom. She requests vodka as a gift for saving her.

Tonya does it, though. And gives them phallic-shaped gifts. Connor tells Michaela that she can use it to have her first orgasm. Last season, this would have ended in Michaela pushing him down the stairs.

Bonnie accuses Asher of cheating on him because Emily sent him a picture of a girl from Trotter Lake or something. Asher just admits it! You fucking idiot, honestly! You don't just do that to Paris Geller. She will kill you. She's already killed one person before! Actually, two, if you count the first Asher!

Levi is Eggs 911. He's her foster brother, right? Wes is reminding me of someone from a vampire fanfic when he has Levi up against the wall talking to him. He even says to stay away from Michaela! That's why Levi wanted to get with Michaela. To find out what happened to Rebecca. Wes and Levi kind of team up to figure out what happened to her and Wes lets Levi go.

Bonnie and Laurel are drinking at a bar. Apparently, Doucheface is good in bed. Unfortunately. I really just wanted another reason to hate Asher. Laurel pesters her about information on Frank.
"So I kill a girl, and had a boyfriend. Life was too good. It doesn't matter anymore, though. I'll just kill him if he gets on Annalise's bad side."


Frank points out who might have sent information to Emily Sinclair. It's some woman I can't fucking remember for the life of me.

Connor and Oliver are making out on Oliver's bed. They can't even wait until D Day! Then Connor says he has something to tell him. I thought that it was going to be the murder thing, so naturally I start chewing on my nails. It's about the sex party. Connor says he didn't try anything, and Oliver starts to laugh and says he's a changed man. Because even Oliver would have sex at a sex party!



Annalise is trying to look good. Except she's not even trying, because she always looks good. Honestly, her wardrobe is probably one of the best on this show. Her and Michaela have perfect outfits practically every single week.


Speaking of Michaela... Michaela and the one guy start to have sex, She's determined to have an orgasm. Just don't kill him with your vagina!
This screenshot kind of makes the guy look like Donnie Darko, but I assure you he isn't Jake Gyllenhaal. 


Asher meets up with his father about Tiffany (the Trotter Lake girl or something) and it's just... I hate both of them. I'm making a burn book. Just for both of their loser asses.

Annalise went to Nate's apartment. She tried to get him a job. Nate brings up the fact he saw Eve and her together. Wes and Nate are on a team now to take down Annalise! What the fuck is wrong with all of you?!

Flashforward.

There's a car. Nate is in the car. He tells the Murder Four to get in the fucking car. They do so. I'm... what?
It's the light from your sins, Keating Five!

Predictions I was right about:

  • None of them. 
  • Except who has sex.