(note: i am going to try my very hardest not to swear in this post, because i am actually trying to be serious.)
Everyone my age can be affected by sexual harassment. It doesn't matter what gender, sexuality, race what they're wearing, what they're saying, or anything else.
The reason why I'm posting this blog post (and practically breaking my keyboard in the process of typing this) is because my sexual harassment seems to be trivialized every single day. Why? Because I actually choose to respond back to it in a negative way. How
dare someone EVER have the audacity to not like what someone is saying about them?! Oh, and also the fact that I'm gay.
Yeah. that's right. I'm gay. Woo. I probably don't have a crush on you, by the way.
I also don't think any guy that's ever been attracted to me is sexually harassing me. I've had a few male friends over the years who have been attracted to me, and I'm perfectly fine with that.
Now, I'm not writing some big coming out story. I'm not writing some sad sob story about how so-and-so picked on me because I liked women. I think most people have heard it all before.
I am a human being, however, and those things deserve to be treated with respect. No matter what their sexuality is or whoever they just want to cuddle in bed with or whatever. However, because I am gay, I seemed to have drawn attention from this incredibly creepy guy who blames the entire world for his life problems rather than actually owning up to it like a reasonable adult that he claims to be. Now, to go into details about this guy, since I'm sure you would love to know more about this
absolute catch...
- He blames the world for having a 1.8 GPA. The fact he spends most of his time at high school doing stuff I'm going to talk about that later doesn't even matter to him.
- He blames women for only caring about his looks. Actually, plenty of women don't care what you look like. Trust me, most of my friends that are girls only care about their boyfriends' personalities. It doesn't matter if you're fat or ugly, honestly. That stuff is all subjective to most people. Most women only care about if you can honestly make them laugh.
- He blames the world for his 14 on the ACT.
- He blames the world for the fact he can't take free college classes. Because they're against him 'having problems', obviously.
- Blames me for not making his life easier for him by not being straight.
- Blames his mother for literally everything on the planet.
And the list goes on and on.
So I have a friend. She is a very close friend, but she is also very close friends with this guy. Actually, let's name him right here, right now. His name is Garet. If he feels comfortable with giving out my full name and where I go to school and my sexuality on his YouTube channel, I feel comfortable with naming him. My friend told me about some of his life problems. I felt a little bit bad and I did try my best to become friends with him.
Then, he gave her a note saying he liked me. No big deal. Now he tried his hardest to stay away from me. Because manhood problems, probably.
Until I accidentally said I was a lesbian in front of him.
Then, he started messaging me constantly. He told me that he wished I was straight because we got along so well that he felt I would be the perfect girlfriend and it would make his life easier. His life easier. His. Because a lesbian being a lesbian has such an easy life. The only person who is really affected by that is the guy chasing after her. He must sit alone in his room and, ehrm.
Never mind the fact lesbians face people like him who act like they know everything about lesbianism. Never mind the fact The L Word ended a long, long time ago. Never mind the fact that when they report harassment from men like him, they have no choice but to come out about their sexuality.
One day, I took a nap and woke up to five new messages. All from him. One of them was a YouTube link of a video he made, dedicating it to lesbians. AKA me. Then he messaged me being really snappy about not replying back.
He literally said that it's 'magical' for lesbians to even exist. Because they don't procreate and they adopt. You know, stray cats and children. And that lesbians are attractive. Oh, that's not that bad?
Well, he said that lesbians mess with men's minds. Also, he said he wanted to sleep with me and 'procreate' with me.
Now, other than being a lesbian, I also have a fear of childbirth. So, uh, inconsiderate. And if you're going to be creepy towards me, can't you at least take me out to Red Lobster first?
This wasn't the only video he made. He made several ones about how he wished I would just date him and even got his friend to harass me about how I should just 'change' for him. Because true love changes people.
Except this isn't a love story. This is my life. My life isn't sexual or romantic or anything. Sure, I may date people here and there and find girls unbelievably attractive, but I am not an object. I am a creature with depth and obstacles and intelligence. Contrary to popular belief, I sit down on Sundays and watch Shameless all the same as you straight people should. I also care about stuff other than queer theory. Wow, what a surprise.
Why do I need to clarify this stuff? Well, because there's a lot of people out there who think that I am an object or lesser because I'm gay. Now, I think most people in my generation see gay men as people, but not so much lesbians. That isn't to say everyone feels that way, but there's a lot of people I feel scared about coming out to. Because I don't want to be that creepy lesbian.
So Garet felt the need to always tell me that sexuality is fluid. That, because he used to identify as gay, and he doesn't anymore, that I could possibly be the same way. Now, I'm not stellar at math or anything, but I will say that in the graph of all things that make sense, neither of those things correlate with each other. Like, if I was the Gordon Ramsay of math, I'd tell you to get back to the notebook paper you ****ing **** before all of the people reviewing your data throw pencils at you. Which, honestly, they should.
Never mind the fact I can't see myself being with a guy. Never mind the fact I don't feel anything for a man. Never mind the fact that anyone deserves a partner who loves them and is attracted to them.
I don't want to go into vivid details about this, because for all I know, he could be reading this. And since he seems to like to find peoples' issues as material for his right hand, I probably shouldn't.
He romanticizes everyone's pain. He tells me about how so-and-so is homophobic, just to make me realize how terrible my life is being gay. Then he romanticizes depression and people who are in bad relationships. He just wants to 'help' them, by dating them.
While eavesdropping on private conversations of mine, he has learned so much about me that he tries using against me. Like the fact I take Zoloft. Because I'm a 'real crazy', guys. Except for the fact I take it for anxiety. Even if I was taking if for 'crazy' stuff, it's none of his business, and at least, I'm not him.
He always pretends to be smarter than everyone else. To put it bluntly, he's not. He just knows how to manipulate people. Every single time you tell him to leave you alone, he tells you that he feels like his life doesn't matter.
He argues with teachers and tells him that he's either as smart as them and even sometimes smarter. See, this guy is the reason why I think teachers are underpaid.
Garet also complains about schoolwork and says that none of the teachers understand what he's going through. Now aside the fact that if he stopped focusing on having a social life and you know, bothering people, he could have enough time to do his crap... I don't think he knows that he is typically given assignments weeks in advance. Maybe he could cut down on his production of crappy YouTube videos, too. I mean, getting your GPA through your typical ways up is hard to do. Unless you're attractive or play sports.
Garet, you have no skills or work ethic. You don't know what it's like to squeeze in everything in one day. All you know how to do is to manipulate everyone. That may get you by in life in high school, but it won't get you farther than that. You can't manipulate people into giving you your dream job or anything like that. Life just doesn't work that way.
Garet also got in trouble for sleeping with a twelve-year old. Actually, I'll use the word trouble lightly. The only reason why Garet didn't get in trouble is because he told the police that it was all his mother's fault that he did something like this. Oh, and Garet was 17 at the time. Now, I don't think the law should excuse someone's stupidity on age when they're not getting any smarter. Garet is a hebephile.
That's probably not a word that Garet knows of, so I'll explain it to you simply. Pedophilia is when someone is attracted to children. Hebephilia is when you're attracted to young pubescent children. This falls into the range of about 11-14. Why is this a problem?
Well, to put it simply, kids that age don't know crap. So they see a guy like this who says that he wants to help them with their young adolescent angst, and he promises that he's going to help them. What do they do? Believe him. And they go off and run off with him. Just like a certain YouTuber I'm not going to mention here.
The twelve-year old he had sexual intercourse with got called a slut by him afterwards.
Garet uses his tragic backstory as a means to get away with stuff. It's never actually affecting him until you get incredibly mad about what he's saying. His tragic backstory literally sounds like something I would scoff at in a story.
Garet also has no clue how the female body works, but acts like he knows more about it than actual females do. Apparently, a woman's genitalia tastes like whatever she eats most. I mean, I'm sure that there's a few women that wish this was a superpower that they could have, but it's not. He also doesn't know why girls can sometimes look like they have no boobs. He also thinks that women can get pregnant almost immediately after having sex. He also thinks the word 'moist' is okay to use in smut.
Now, if you want to know more about this absolute gentleman, he probably thinks your boyfriend is a piece of garbage and they're what's wrong with men. Yes, your boyfriend and you can get into a single fight and he will find about it and tell you that he's garbage. Never mind that he has more flaws than your boyfriend ever could have.
Yes, he dates women as placeholders for who he really wants! Yes, he may just blame you for his depression! Yes, he may just say he's going to shoot up a school! But he's a gentleman. A TRUE GENTLEMAN. And he's better for you than your boyfriend ever could be.
Why is he better for you than your boyfriend? Well, because he has feelings.
You know why I don't care about your feelings, Garet? Because you don't consider mine or anyone else's. I don't care if you find this or this gets passed along to you, because honestly? You deserve a true representation of yourself. You have this view of yourself as the superior man. I'm glad that no colleges want you, because you don't deserve a future if all you can do in life is manipulate people into feeling bad for you.
Garet also announces that I'm a lesbian very loudly on occasions so he can try to piss me off. Well, here's the thing: I am not out to everyone. So when I have to report this, I have to explain that I'm a lesbian. You know, so people know I'm not 'provocating' this crap. And nobody seems to care after I say I am a lesbian.
Garet also acted like I'm faking being a lesbian when I said I wasn't participating in the Day of Silence. Well, Garet, frankly, I didn't feel the need to until you came along. In fact, I felt comfortable about myself until you came along. Then I started seeing my sexuality as a disability that was going to make my last few years of high school rough.
Imagine this: after years of feeling different, you finally find friends you're comfortable with. You may even find someone to date in these times. You're comfortable with your body. You're just getting comfortable with saying the 'l' or 'g' word.... you think the world may actually be a good place. Then this idiot comes along and tells you that you're not who you claim to be because he's attracted to you.
Garet, you are the reason I fall under the 9/10 ratio for harassment that happens with LGBT youth in schools. Funny, you seem to be all into gay rights and telling people that gay is normal, but you go out of your way to point out everyone who is gay because you want it to be known.
You are the human embodiment of a viral STI. You contribute nothing good to this world. You're a pest.
I am not your lesbian BFF. I am not that lesbian bitch. I am not your queer friend. I am not your dream girl. I'm Brianna. I am a student. I want to be an animator.
Garet, I find it laughable that you had the audacity to tell me that I was never going to get into any colleges, but you don't want us to snicker to ourselves about how no colleges will ever tell you they are interested in you after hearing your GPA and ACT score. I am taking college classes at 3 different colleges. For you to suggest that you know more about what colleges are looking for is entirely ridiculous.
Colleges look at you the way most women look at you after hearing you speak for more than .5 seconds. They don't want you.
Now whose fault is that? Oh, certainly not your own! Your GPA has nothing to do with you! Screw that logic!
Let's get to what other people think about Garet.
Most people pretend to like Garet. Garet has no redeeming qualities to him and most people see right through this. Now, many people have caused me problems because I have repeated told Garet that he is creepy.
Many people think I'm a bitch that hates all men because I have a problem with Garet. Would that be different if I was straight? Hum. Let's think about that for a second while nibbling on a few pieces of celery.
In fact, I would consider it downright hypocritical if a girl has a problem with me defending myself against him but they say the exact same-
Oh wait. Girls do that. Apparently I'm the 'mean' one because I have the cojones to say it to his face. Yes, there are actual girls who call me a bitch for telling him the exact same things he has said to me in the past, but they call him fat and ugly behind his back. Yes, I'm the only one with those magical cojones to tell him this is happening. Right in front of their faces.
Now, I don't feel like I'm discriminated against for being a lesbian. I just feel like it's a bit unfair to assume I have a problem against men just because I don't like this guy. Truthfully, I don't care about anyone unless they're my friend.
So what has Garet told me about his life? Well, this absolute catch shaves his pubic hair, first of all. I told him to shut up before he told me that, and a girl got really mad at me for that. Seconds later, at lunch, she could call him fat and ugly all she wants. Is this straight privilege?
He also told most of his friend group his penis size. Girls, it's below average! He tells you before you are disappointed! It's like, less than 3 inches, apparently. The pubic hair probably covers it up and that's why he wants to shave. I feel like vomiting while writing this.
He also likes to screw dead people!
And he's also sexually attracted to Sims with custom content on them.
If you want to order him for 9.99, I would be more than happy to sell him to you. Actually, hell, I'm willing to pay for you to take him. I'll give you a 20 dollar Gamestop card if you could just drop him off in Iceland.
He seems more interested in making me seem like a depressed lesbian who just needs a man to make her feel straight rather than actually treating me like a friend. Well, I'm not a TV Trope. I'm a person. I have wants, needs, aspirations...
But hey, paint me as the depressed girl that you've been waiting for since 7:00 A.M. Paint me up as this whore that just won't screw you. Paint me as that lonely lesbian who just falls in your arms at night. At the end of the day, you don't know me. You will never know me. You can listen in on all of my conversations and read all of my blog posts, but you don't know anything about me.
I've known people like you. I know that you use every single excuse in the book so you can have your entire life handed to you. Eventually, it's going to end. Either you evolve or you...
Garet, you can call my friend the fat and ugly friend. But no, your tragic backstory doesn't save you from anything here. Once you say that, I don't feel bad for saying that you would be the fat and ugly friend if you had any. I am not the bad person for telling you that.
You know why? Because I've had enough of you. You can try your damnedest to manipulate everyone, but there's always going to be people one step in front of you. And I am proud to be one of those people.
Also, you're not classy. You act like a buffoon twenty-four/ seven. You can comb your hair and put on nice clothes, but that doesn't mean you have class. You can proclaim Christianity, but that doesn't mean that you're not one of God's mistakes.
Garet, you are just like every other entitled idiot on this planet. You're not special for being pansexual. You're not special for having family problems. You're not even special for liking Star Wars.
So, dear reader, are you wondering why I haven't reported this yet? Well, here's the thing. I have reported it. I reported the fact he kept talking about how he was going to shoot up the school, and me and my friend got asked why they should take it seriously. We had to bring up this story.
Well, here's the thing, people. Garet thinks he can be a writer. He is not a writer. His stories make Twilight and 50 Shades of Grey look perfect in comparison. In fact, it would make My Immortal look flawless.
Garet can't type. Garet's writing style is completely crappy. He can't portray a normal, happy relationship. And he will probably ruin John Legend for you after you read this. And Garet cannot write sex scenes.
So this story has me in it. Twice. I'm both Brenda and Megan. He's the boring main character. The boring main character and Megan have sex. Yes, he actually wrote me having sex with him in his story. Maybe you don't see this as a problem, but the fact he's so uneducated he thinks my genitalia must taste like strawberries actually kind of concerns me. Go back to health class.
Oh, yeah, spoiler: the story ends in a school shooting. He has repeatedly mentioned how he wants to shoot up the school before. Here's the entirety of what I have (because frankly I don't want to screenshot this mess because I think my computer will blow up if I do):
Dear Diary
By:Mortuum Anima
12-5-15
8-31-15
Monday
This is a stupid idea, my counselor thinks that this will help me emotionally because i refuse to talk to her...so here it goes...I am going to tell you a story.
Dear diary:(Or at least that's how i think that starts)
My name is Alexzadrya McKenzy Alby, or well at least it is now. My last name used to be Phaith. I am 17 years old. If by chance you couldn't tell by my name I’m a girl. You probably don’t care about what I look like but just incase you do, I’m 5’7, long red hair, green eyes, and braces. I get my braces off in 3 years.
But you’re not here for that, you want the nitty gritty. You want my life story don't you? Let's start at the beginning shall we. It all started on December 11th 1997, The day that I was born. My mother died that day due to a brain aneurysm at age 27. This in turn drove Bryan (My father) into alcoholism even though the doctor told him that it wasn't my fault and that it could have blown at any time he still blames me for Adryannas death.
Due to this he used to beat me, Vigorously and when that didn't satisfy him he would touch me sexualy. One day mid December, the 15th I think it was. No it had to be because it was only a few days after my 7th birthday. Bryan came home drunk and began yelling some rather rude things at me. “come here you little slut.” “I'm going to kill you you fucking whore.”
I began to run, Running through the house so hard that I could feel my heart beating out of my little chest. My lungs felt as though they were about to explode. I began to slow down thinking “Maybe he wouldn’t do anything this time.” That's when I felt his hand grasp the back of my shirt and pull it as hard as he could. I began to run once more, my shirt ripped in two. Now topples I was running as fast and as hard as my tiny legs would allow.
I had made it to salvation, I made it to Bryan's bedroom and locked the door behind me. He was beating on it and screaming “When I get through this door you are a dead girl.” Rummaging through his bedside drawers I found his gun a .38 special, a nice little snub nose revolver. The next thing that happened was the moment that changed my life forever. Bryan kicked in the door, the door went everywhere. In that moment everything went blank. All that I could hear was the sound of the gun going off. My “Father” was laying on the ground bleeding out from the round that i had placed somehow perfectly into the center of his chest.
Hours had passed and I was at Princeton plainsboro teaching hospital (PPTH) being treated for shock and getting questioned by officer Ferguson, I think that’s his name. When he left the room the doctor closed the blinds and performed a rape and STD (sexual transmited deciese) test...thank god the STD test came back negative.
With no living relatives I became a ward of the state spending the next five years in Snt. Peters home for girls and boys before a nice family from Ohio adopted me. there names were John and Jane Alby. So that's where i say that my name changed to Alexzandrya McKenzy Alby. They had another child, a son his name was Sebastian.
I never understood why they adopted since they had him. Maybe it was a empty nest syndrome because Sebastian was 17 and a junior in High School and leaving for college soon. He had luscious blonde hair and beautiful blue eyes. I had fallen in love with him within the first week of being around him. Just listening to his voice which was as smooth as honey and it made me melt.
We used to talk a lot, But that all changed when school started back up. Me as a 7th grader and he a senior in High school. i was so envious of him. I walked home from school every day because the middle school was only 7 minutes walking time from the house. Sebastian drove because the the high school was 30 minutes in the opposite direction.
One day when i got home from school I saw Sebastian’s door was closed. It wasn't a big deal, I was used to it by now but today I wanted to see my older brother. I opened the door and walked into his room, I saw him...let's see how do I put this...he was...stroking his...well you know...his cock...He quickly covered himself with his blanket and told me to leave his room. I blushed and looked down at the ground.
I had my eyes closed and I told him “No I just want to spend time with my brother.” so I walked over and sat down on his bed and started to rub his leg. somehow I had convinced him to let me stay and he had me close his door. On the way back I took off my shirt off slowly in order to arouse him. I remember not have been wearing a bra that day. When I got back to his bed I sensually slid my skirt off, I knew it was wrong but it was like I wasn't in control of my body. I had been waiting to do this for about six months now. He stood up letting the blanket fall to the floor, his half erect penis was growing back to it's previous size. He picked me up off of my feet and laid me on his bed.
Sebastian pulled of my panties and started rubbing the outside of my vagina, tickling my clitorus. He then stuck his finger in my now drippingly moist vagina. He had fingered me for a few minutes before I convulsed and came. he then began to eat me out, I came three more times beforehe stood up and laid down on top of me and let his 7.5 inches slide inside of me.
Slowly at first and then more vigorously, faster and faster he went. The faster he went the more I convulsed and the louder I moaned. We made sweet, sweet, satisfying love for 45 minutes before he pulled out and came on my stomach. The next day he died in a car crash, hit by a drunk driver on the way to pick me up from school because it was to cold to walk home that day.
Later that year John and Jane got divorced and I was left with Jane. John signed over all rights that he had over me. He left me with a broke, nearly homeless woman. With no money Jane turned to prostitution and drugs, not just doing but selling as well. Once I even had to sit and watch a junkie shoot Cocaine into his veins to make sure that he didn't fall out.
9-1-15
Tuesday
It is a new day, I'm not really sure what I could talk about now. I told you what I look like, my past, my first love. Oh Speaking of love I didn't tell you about him, Grant Theodore Michaels. Grant is my boyfriend, has been for four years. Since freshman year when his family moved here from Britain. He is tall 5’11, he has brown hair and the same beautiful blue eyes as Sebastian. Grant is the quarterback of the football team. His dad is the coach so it's not a surprise. But I think that it was his eyes, Sebastian's eyes that made me fall for Grant. But now that we have been together for...well the ninth will be 4 years now, I know that I love him. Oh yes I am a senior now school just started about three weeks back. It brings me joy to see all my friends and Grant again thank we share the same lunch table and period.
9-2-15
Wednesday
8-Am
I just made it to school and i found grant talking to one of his football buddies about one of those slutty little cheerleader girls. But that doesn't bother me because i know that grant loves me, I know this because he has never asked me for sex and every time that i asked him he always tells me that he isn't ready, Grant is one of those goodie goodie christian guys who goes to church every sunday. I only go to make Grant happy. But I’m an Atheist.
9-3-15
Thursday
1-Am
I just awoke in fear, sweat pouring down my face, hands trembling. I just had a nightmare/memory that my father was chasing me again but this time the gun didn't go off. I want to pick up a razor blade again, i haven't cut since me and grant got together. He told me that “Next time you cut you are cutting me as well.” and i haven't picked up a blade since.
You see I started cutting when Sebastian died. His death devastated me that I have tried everything to be with him again. Cutting, pills, I even tried to hang myself once in the 8th grade but some junky bitch cut me down. I spent a week in the mental hospital for “Suicidal thoughts and tendencies”
8:45-Am
I am wearing Grants football hoodie in order to cover my wrists, I feel so bad for what i did. I don't know if I should tell Grant or if I should just lie until they are healed.
1-Pm
I'm sitting in the principal's office, some guy grabbed my butt and I flipped out and beat the hell out of him. Grant is taking me home later today.
2:35-Pm
School just let out and Grant just picked me up from the office and carried me out to his car,and he just asked me “What are you writing in that book? It feels like you are keeping secrets from me.”
5-Pm
We had pulled up to my house and Grant got out to let me out of the car. But i told him that i couldn't go back in there i just couldn't do it, I told him everything, I broke down and told him what Bryan had done to me, how John left me with Jane and what she does for a living. He drove me out to basicly the middle of nowhere and we are cuddling or well will be after he gets done taking a piss.
9-9-15
Wednesday
Sorry that i haven't written in a few days but nothing interesting has happened to me. But today, today is my four year anniversary. Four years i can't believe that it has been four years. I'm sitting at lunch, it's odd though because i'm the only one sitting here alone, just waiting for my friends, oh here comes grant.
OH MY GRANT (OMG) So here is what happened. He came into the lunch room and grabbed my my hand and asked me out to his car were all of friends were standing. He got into his car and turns on the radio “All of me” by John legend started playing. Standing there he drops to one knee holding out a 1x1 inch box he pops the top on it and asks “Will you marry me?” I broke down into tears, smiled and said Yes, Yes, a million times yes.” It's been an hour now and i'm sitting in class, tears still rolling down my face. the teacher asked me into the hall so that he could ask me what was wrong. I responded simply by showing him my hand and he congratulated me.
3:35-Pm
I got a ride home from Grant today. He got out of the car and let me out of the car. He gave me the most passionate kiss ever. When i walked into the house Jane was slumped over the kitchen table sleeping, nothing new, i had grown accustomed to it. I ran upstairs to take a shower, The warm water felt so good running down my body. The liquid flowing over my scarred wrists stung a little at first but was soothing overall.
Oh fuck that's right i cut myself...i'm going to have to tell Grant. I sent him this text: “Grant, baby i need to talk to you. Can you come over?”
“Yes Alex i’ll be there in 20 minutes”
5:30-Pm
I told him, I told him every dirty little detail. Everything. I told him everything. How I killed Bryan after he raped me for 6 years, how I spent 5 years in Snt. Peters, everything, well not about Sebastian, well his death not the sex. Grant just looked at me and said “I understand princess” and then he kissed my scars.
9-10-15
Thursday
6-Am
Grant stayed the night we watched House on the Netflix and cuddled until like 11:30 at night when we fell asleep. I woke up with another nightmare but grants arms were still around me, so that made me feel better. I know that he may not of wanted to sleep with me yet but I sure could feel his boner pressing up against my ass. Grant says “perfectly heart shaped butt”
Grant woke up this morning as I was changing for school. I was about to put my bra on when he woke up. If I am correct this is the first time Grant has seen me without my shirt on. Scared I quickly turned around to put my back to him so that I can put on my bra and throw on a white T-Shirt when I realised that here was a mirror right there. I hurriedly finished dressing. Grant acting like a little boy asked me what size they were, so I told him that they were a 34D. He was amazed.
9:30-Pm
I am now in third period with my best friend Shayne. She saw that Grant had driven me to school today and insisted that I “tell her everything, and that she knows that something happened.” So I told her that nothing had happened but Netflix and cuddles, She didn't believe me so we just went back to our work.
3:30-Pm
I had to call Grant to come and take me away from this place. Jane was still laying face down on the table in the same position as the day before. I was worried so after I called grant I dialed 911 and when they got here the EMT pronounced her dead. An overdose the night before. I could not believe it the wretched woman that had ruined my life with drugs and whoring since I was 13 had died.
The officer had asked me a bunch of questions like “What happened?” “Do you know anything?” “Do you have anywhere to stay?” and that's when Grant pulled in so I told the cop “I have my Fiance Grant.” The cop asked us our ages so I told him “I'm 17 and Grant is 19” Grant came over and hugged me. the cop said that we couldn't stay more than a few days so Grant looked at me and said “Sunday.” then looked at the cop and asked “Can she stay until sunday?” The cop agreed to that Me and Grant ran up to my room to get some stuff so that I could move into his house. When we left for Grants house he told me to call everyone and tell them be ready by sunday, so I did.
9-13-15
Sunday
Noon
I'm in Grants mother's old fashioned but beautiful wedding dress, and he is in his father’s old tux. We are using his grandparents rings so overall I'm happy. Fuck I'm so happy that I think that I'm going to be sick. I'll write more after the ceremony
3-Pm
Wew...I didn't think that was so bad. Grant's father walked me down the aisle, he gave me a hug and sent me off. Shayne and Jordyn looked fabulous next to me. The preacher asked for our vows so I gave mine first.
“Grant my love you are my everything,
My Kent Clark, my Bruce Wayne, my Tony Stark,
My super hero who's always been there for me”
And before I could finish he stopped me and said
“And Alexzandrya I Always will be,
You are my Harley Quinn,
my Padme Amidala,
my Princess Leia,
I love you.”
Basicly I fucking melted, you see I'm a huge fucking geek. I have straight A’s in class, I love Anime, Star Wars, and Harry Potter. Next the preacher asked us all the usual crap and you know what Grant did next? He kissed me for what seemed like the first time even though we have kissed basically every day since 9-9-11. I can't wait to get home and get out of this damned dress. we are on the way home now. That and Grant just told me that he was “Ready”
9;45-Pm
JESUS FUCK...That was amazing, Grant walked into the room where I was standing in just my bra and panties. He in his boxers, taking me into his arms, holding me tightly and kissing me with such passion. He picked me up after undoing my bra and twirling me around he laid me on his bed. All that I could think of was Sebastian and I. Grant stood up and dropped his boxers revealing 8 inches and he was only half erect he got down and kissed me than began to eat me out. Trying to resist the urge to moan Sebastian's name so I whispered it, thank god that Grant didn't hear it.
He stuck his index finger inside my vagina...I may not be a virgin but I’m tight...Grant thinks that it's because of Bryan, if he ever found out about Sebastian he would probably leave me. Grant slowly worked his way up to two fingers and i began to moan harder and louder and could not control it but at least I moaned “Grant” that's when he stood up and began to kiss me up my body.
Grant slid the entirety of his erect penis into my drippingly moist vagina. Slow at first but eventually working his way up to full speed before he off. OMG I just realized that we didn't use a fucking condom. oh well I'll get a test next week. besides I'm on the pill
9-14-15
Monday
6-Am
I woke up early today so that I could make Grant breakfast, eggs and bacon. But when I walked in he was laying on the bed , blanket half off. So I put the food down on the bedside table and pulled the blanket the rest of the way off. Grabbing his erect penis and stroking it until he woke up fully erect. I put it in my mouth and began to suck on it, That's right I blew him until he came in my mouth. I contemplated spitting or swallowing. In the end i swallowed it like the dirty little whore that I am...There wasn't much taste to it at all. After that we ate, got dressed (him in blue jeans and a white T-shirt, me in Grants hoodie and a pair of sweatpants) and we went to school.
9-Am
So Shayne came up to me in English class and asked me “What happened I know something happened?” So I told her, I told her everything. So she then asked me if Grand was better than Sebastian. You see Shayne is the one friend that I’ve had since I was 12. She has been my next door neighbor and we tell eachother everything, and on top of that she’s the only person that knows about my first true love. but anyways I told her “Yes, yes he was” she asked me if I needed a pregnancy test because her mum is a nurse. I said “Yes”
9-15-15
Tuesday
I have a math test today and I have a English paper due tomorrow. My parenting class is giving out the electronic babys out on friday. I am swamped, I think that the only day that I have free is Thursday. I hope to spend time with Grant then I'm going over to Shanyne’s house this weekend, if I'm correct Jordyn will be there as well.
9-18-15
Friday
3-Pm
HOLLY SHIT. I'm having a baby . The tests came back positive (all three of them) I'm having a baby, did you hear that diary? I'm having a baby. But how do I tell grant?
5-pm
Grant just got home from work and i told him, I came out of the bathroom after taking another test (my umpteenth one today) with tears running down my face “What's wrong?” He asked. “Nothing” I said breaking into a full on tear fest. He got up and hugged me and insisted that I tell him what was wrong. I told him “Well you remember Sunday? well you didn't use a condom and now...well...we are...you know” That's when grant broke down into tears as well...Fuck I'm so happy...I need to tell Shayne and Jordyn
9-19-15
Saturday
Noon
It's Saturday, I'm over at Shaynes, Jordyn is over as well. She hates kids but I have the fake one with me for the weekend and she threatened to kill it. When I told them they almost slapped me for being “Stupid”
9-21-15
Monday
7:30
We just made it to school, we came early so that I could drop the baby off. I told her what had happened and she seemed a little sarcastic when she said “Good for you” but overall she seems supportive of me because she knows some of my background.
3-pm Hey baby I love you and just wanted to tell you that...oh and I only wrote in here to see you smile, I didn't read any of it.
3:30
Well fuck..it kind of worked, I am smiling. but I'm still pissed that he wrote in my diary. I want to start a diet for the baby you know. But I'm afraid that if I do grant might cheat...On the diet, not me or so I'd hope, no I know that he loves me.
4-Pm
We just made it to the store and we are only buying vegetarian stuff. No meats at all, but now that I think about it I might cheat as well, lol I’ll try not to.
6:45
I just found a new anime on the Netflix, It's called Vampire night and omg let me tell you it's pretty fucking good so far and I'm only on episode like five. But I still want to rewatch animes like:
Death note
Bleach
Akame ga kill
Sword art online
Rosario + Vampire
9-22-15
Tuesday
So Grant told me on the way to school today that he has a honeymoon planned for June first, we will be going to Niagara Falls. I love this boy so much. he also told me that he's making a vegetarian version of my favorite meal...Lasonya. He is such a sweet guy, I hope that our child(ren) act as sweet as he does.
OMG This lasonya tastes so freaking good, who knew that Grant knew how to cook? and this well too.
9-23-15
Wednesday
It’s official, it's the first day of autumn (fall) I love this season so fucking much. All because everything is dying around me. So Iron Man 1-3 are on the T.V today and i love them so much like okay I have a secret crush on Tony Stark, he's so cute. Let's see, we have a football game to go to this Friday. As I said Grant is the quarterback because his stepfather is the coach. You see Grant and his mum are from England and he used to play soccer for years until they moved here. So now because our school doesn't offer soccer he plays football and is damn good at it too.
12:31-Pm
I want another tattoo so much, oh yeah I never told you that I got a tattoo for my 17th birthday that says “Remember Forever” one word on each wrist. But I want another so badly.
5:07-Pm
Grant and I Just took an early shower before dinner, and for being a man Grant sure is gentile. He washed my hair for me as I...well you know. Wow I really am a dirty little girl.
9-27-15
Sunday
7-Am
I think that I'm going to take up poetry but I don't know if I will be any good at it, so here goes.
Beautiful eyes and curved thighs.
Slit wrists and luscious lips.
Lengthy hair, skin at a tear.
This sad little girl is going nowhere.
I'm not sure diary, but at least it rhymes right?
Noon
Grant wants to take me out to a picnic, he is so sweet. We should be having salad and other vegetables, Grant really is trying to stick to this diet thing. I'm trying to but OMG chocolate cravings though.
9-28-15
Monday
8-Am
So i was listening to music on the way to school today and i'm not talking that new age pop/rock shit i'm talking real music like:
BVB(Black veil brides)
SWS(Sleeping with sirens)
MIW(Motionless in white)
SS(Suicide silence)
OMAM(Of mice and men)
Countless Goodbyes
In this moment
falling in reverse
But don't get me wrong i'll listen to some softer shit as well.
Nickelback
Katy Perry
The Gaga
Beethoven
Mozart
I have it all in my phone and i just throw it on shuffle. OMG i love this guy, he just pulled into Circle K so that i could get a coffee before school. Mudslide mocha french vanilla hazelnut coffee. Just OMG i love coffee, I'm so jacked right now and when this wears off i have a Monster for lunch.
5-Pm
So I filled out a job application for Subway, I hope that i get the job because i feel bad for making Grant pay for everything. Oh yeah Grants job, right now he works part time at the police station. Nothing big yet just getting coffee and other entry level crap you know. He says that he wants to be a police officer one day but it scares me, i don't want to lose him. Me on the other hand, I want to be a teacher. I know that sounds absurd coming from a recovering suicidal drug addict but I love school It's one of my favorite past times.
9-29-15
Tuesday
4-Pm
So we are watching The Matrix Reloaded and there was a fight seen and Grant goes “Okay cracky chan.” I fucking lost it, it was great. I am still waiting on a call back from Subway, actually the phone is ringing now.
YES, YES, YES. That was them I got the job. And they must have been short staffed because they sure as shit called back pretty fast. They asked if i could Start Thursday, tomorrow is my training day.
10-2-15
Friday
Noon
So we are having some sort of party tonight, we are having all of our friends over, It should be amazing. As for work, that went well and i go back today after school from 4-9:30 and then the party starts at 10:30, I should have time to get ready.
10-Pm
The party starts in 30 minutes, i don't know what to wear. Red, Pink, Purple...Yeah i'll wear a purple dress. I want to get drunk tonight but i have the baby to worry about. Maybe one shot, yeah one shot and i should be good considering that i used to be an alcoholic. Hell if it weren't for Grant i probably still would be. I couldn't drink beer though, it always made me sick and reminded me of my father so i drank vodka and whisky.
10-3-15
Saterday
Noon
Holy shit that party was amazing. Okay so i did have more that one drink, One of vodka and one of whisky but that's it. I had a great time even though i didn't get drunk. i had fun swimming in the pool which has beautiful neon lights in the bottom of it. We ate, drank, partied but I have to work in an hour so i'll write more after 8
8:45-Pm
So i just got off, of work you perve. So today at work some guy was hitting on me and the (female) manager told me that i could hit him and get away with it but i didn't i just handed dude his food and said “Have a pleasant day” Dammit i'm way to nice
Oh so this really cute girl named Megan asked me out for a drink after work so i told her to pick me up around 9. Oh yeah did i forget to mention that i'm bisexual. Grant knows about it and he accepts me for who i am. He says that i can hug and kiss other girls but if i wanted to go further that i would have to bring her home to share with him as well, but this girl is a full on lesbian so i don't this will get very far. I'll be back after my “date” lol
11:15-Pm
So that went great, she was drinking jack and coke. I was drinking Monster, no alcohol, she understood. But when she got drunk she started kissing me and rubbing my thigh. Things were getting hot and heavy and the next thing that i know we were at her house on her couch, her face deep in my Vagina. And before you go getting all judgemental on me yes i know that it is wrong because i am married but i did not touch her, she touched me. So like that's not cheating is it? I don't know, it felt so damn good. I think that I am going to try and trick her into joining Grant and i in the bedroom. He wouldn't touch her of course, well unless she let him, I don't know. Megan is a damn beautiful girl though. Well I'm going to sit here and cuddle with my hubby as we watch the Netflix and not say a word about my “Date”. I'll be back in the morning. Goodnight diary.
10-4-15
Sunday
6-Am
So Grant sensed that i was still horny from my “date” so we had sex again last night and I don't know who is better at this him or Megan. We are going to church today, even though i'm as i said an atheist i still love my Grant and just want to be around him.
1-Pm
I'm at work now, church went okay i guess but it's still whatever. Work is going slow as hell but that is also whatever, less work for me. Oh i forget, me and Megan are kinda a thing now, not like a thing but like a thing you know. Friends with benefits really. She asked me to the mall after work so i asked if i could bring grant. she told me “But I want to try on bras and what not.” I tried arguing with her but she still inevitably said “No.” So i guess i will be back after the mall.
11-Pm
Well, that was just, wow. We got to the mall and went straight to Victoria Secrets. And let me tell you, Megan has one hell of a body. After buying the sexyst thing that she could we went watched a movie and headed back to her place. She sat me on her couch and went to change. She came out wearing the sexyst thing that i have ever seen. I mean 5’7, blonde haired, blue eyed, C cupped hottie standing there in a red bra and pantie set and a pair of red stiletto heels. Just wow, i lost it, hell i was dripping But she refused to touch me this time. So I layed her on the couch and pulled her panties off with my teeth. I stuck my finger in her moist vagina, I worked my way up to two before i began to eat her out. And for it being my first time doing anything to a woman let me tell you this, I love it, she tasted like strawberries...Yummy.
10-5-15
Monday
Noon
OMG, I'm such a dirty little whore. I Promised grant that i wouldn't do anything but kiss the girl. I don't know what to do. I can't tell Grant or could I? No, I'll have to have her over for a threesome and hope that she agrees, I'll even promise her that Grant won't touch her. But on the bright side it's October, my favorite holiday. The one where i can truly be myself, all gothed out and everything. I am going as a gothed out zombie doctor and Grant a vampire. And i know what you are thinking “Aren't we a bit old for this?” Well next year I'll be a mom and Grant a father so shut up about it.
4-Pm
I just got to work, Megan comes in at five. I'll ask her then, but until then i will make sandwiches
6:39-Pm
Lunch break, I just asked Megan over. She agreed as long as Grant doesn't touch her. This is going to be great because now i get to have them both.
10-6-15
Tuesday
6-Am
I just woke up naked cuddled between Megan (also naked) and Grant (in boxers) and let me tell you that was the best night of my life, It was amazing. I think that i orgasomed over 15 times. Wow just wow. This may take a page or two to explain here goes.
So Grant came home last night with chinese food and we all talked and ate and got to know each other, then things escalated...quickly. Grant took off his shirt and Megan helped me with mine. we were wearing matching lingerie. I slid my skirt off and she her jeans. grant took his off as i took off my pantiehose. we were all in our underwear now, As megan and I began to kiss and rub up on each other you could see Grant getting more erect with every second. Simultaneously Megan and I unclipped each other's bras, I could feel myself getting wetter with every passionate kiss that we made. I turned from her and pulled my Grant in close so that i could kiss him. When i did I could feel the fullness of his erect penis pressing against the bottom of my stomach. The next thing that i know is that we are all in the bedroom and i have my hand down Megan's panties and she has her hand on Grant's cock slowly stroking it. She looked at me and said “Hey i never said that i couldn't touch him.” So i kinda just shrugged it off and went back to rubbing her clit. I then dropped to my knees and pulled off her panties and began to lick her vagina, again strawberries. I love strawberries. I then turned to grant and began to suck his cock as i fingered Meagan's moist vagina. i stood up after about 15 minutes and kissed them both. Grant picked me up and laid me on the bed. megan kind of pushed him and crawled on top of me. She pulled my soaked panties off of me. After a few minutes of her eating me out she began to kiss her way up my body until she reached my mouth. She then rolled me over so that i was on top of her. That's when grand walked up to me “Face down ass up” My face in Megan’s vagina, Grants penis in mine, in an awkward thrusting motion of Grant in me and me in Megan. After about 45 minutes grant came inside of me, again. He wasn't the only one, I made Megan squirt in in my mouth about 3-4 times. OMG strawberries. After that we all showered and went to cuddling and sleeping. I probably ought to wake them so that Grant and I can get to school.
Noon
I am sitting at lunch, surrounded by grants friends, and Shayne. Grant is telling his football buddies about last night (Typical guys) His friend Tommy asks “Wait Megan who?” So i told him “Megan Masters” Tommy worriedly asks “The one from Subway?” Grant and I at the same time replied “Yes.” Tommy spit out his milk and said “That's my fucking sister!” so i told him “Well your sister sure fucks good.” He up and walked away from the table as everybody laughed.
3-Pm
Just got home, about to change into my work clothes, I'm actually kind of afraid to go because like last night was great and all but i don't know how Megan took it.
7-Pm
So that pervy guy came back into the store today and started hitting on me. While i took his order Megan came in and basically stuck her tongue down my throat but only after saying “She's mine.” The guy kind of disappointedly walked out of the store. I think Megan really thinks that i am hers, it scares me a little but I don't want to end things with her just yet.
10-Pm
Grant came to pick me up from work today with a puppy in the car. A beautiful black, brown, and white Siberian husky/ German shepherd mix, he has the bluest eyes imaginable. When i asked Grant what his name was he said that it was my choice and that i could name him whatever i wanted. I went with Kyro, for the dog that they used in the Osama Bin Laden raid.
10-7-15
Wednesday
11-Am
I feel sick again but not the same as last time, okay well sort of the same. It was worse this time. I just had to leave class to vomit. OMG pregnancy fucking sucks. I think that I'm just going to go home to sleep it off. I don't know diary but i'm really craving pickles, chocolate, And nacho cheese. And yes i know that sounds disgusting but not to me, to me it sounds amazing.
1-Pm
I had grant take me home and pick me up some food. And i was sort of on to something. Pickles and Chocolate was a bad idea, but a 3 Musketeers bar and nacho cheese was amazing lol.
4-Pm
It's time to go to work, I think that I'm just going to call of work. Yup I'm calling off. I don't even care if Megan is upset that i'm not there but i don't feel good at all. I'm just going to sleep it off and wait for Grant to get off work so that we can Netflix and Chill (Cuddle) Oh yeah that's right Kyro is here, i bet he’ll cuddle with me.
10-10-15
Saterday
10-Am
Wow that was a good night of sleep. Not from Wednesday but just last night. I haven't written since Wednesday because I have been busy with work, school, Grant, and Kyro. I love him (Kyro) or well until he pees/poops on the damn floor but we are working on house training him. Hopefully we will have him trained by the time the baby comes (May/June.) So Grant's mother is supposed to come over today so that we can go out to eat and do girly things, she doesn't know about the baby yet so i'm going to tell her. I hope that she doesn't freak the hell out.
1-Pm
So Julie and I had a nice long talk about things that i already knew about grant like his intimacy issues, and how he loves heights but is afraid of falling. Or how it is hard for him to find someone that he trusts....Etcetera...Etcetera. But while she was just rambling on i kind of interrupted her and said “ I'm pregnant” She dropped her fork and jaw at the same time in shock. she asked the usual “What, how, when.” so i told her. Then she jumped to names. “Wht for a girl/boy”
Boy- Theodore Thomas
Girl Madison Phaith
She was pleased but asked where I got them from so i told her “ Theodore is Grant's middle name and Thomas was Sebastian's. Madison my mother's name and Phaith my biological last name. She accepted that I was expecting another “Why?” to Sebastian’s middle name but didn't get it.
3-Pm
We are getting closer to Halloween, god I love this hollowday. Like i said I love this hollowday because it's the one time a year i can be myself. After church tomorrow me and Grant are going to get stuff for costumes. I am going as a zombie, I have gone as one every year since second grade. I make one hell of a sexy zombie.
10-11-15
Sunday
2-Pm
So we are at Spirit Halloween (the costume shop) and Grant just told me that if i didn't go as a zombie i wasn't getting laid. You see grant kind of has a thing for the undead lol.
10-12-15
Monday
10-Am
Okay so it's like fourth period and I'm so freaking tired, Like it's not even funny because between Grant, Kyro, and stomach pains i was up half the night. But on the bright side we did get our costumes, but Grant says that we can't wear them until the 31st.
3-Pm
So i just got home and Kyro was running in circles chasing his tail. It was freaking adorable. But i have to work in an hour so i can't play with him just yet, I feel so bad about it but i'll be back later so.
8:45-Pm
I came home and Kyro was face down in his food dish, i woke him up. He was extremely happy to see me. We played for a while but now I'm about to cook a nice meal for Grant and I.
11-Pm
So i made a nice dinner for us. Salad, pasta and bread sticks. I was amazed at how well timed it was, Grant walked in the door right as i was fixing plates.
10-13-15
Tuesday
9-Am
I can't wait to buy my own car. I really hate relying on other people you know. I am ready, I know what kind of car that i want. I want a Subaru Forester and the neighbor has one for sale, he already had it switched from a stick shift to an automatic so that's good. The only problem is that he wants $3,500 for it and i don't have that yet. Oh so I signed up for the Drama club today,I would like to act but if i'm only a stage hand that's fine too.
Noon
Everyone is gone today, all I know is that I am the only one at the lunch table. Oh well at least i can get some peace and quiet today. I don't have to work today so I'm going to go home and play some Black Ops II.
10-16-15
Friday
6-Pm
Let's see here we have a football game to go to today, I don't know who it is against but I know that we are going to win. I told Grant that if we win that he can have whatever he wants when we get home.
10-17-15
Saterday
6-Am
Ouch, that fucking hurt. I a never doing that again. We won the game like i said that we would and Grant asked me for anal sex, I of course said “Yes.” I thought that i could be fun...I was wrong.
4-pm
I am on the way to work now, Megan picked me up so i'm riding with her today. A few more weeks of work and i should be able to buy that Forister. I really don't want to be going to work right now because I'm still so tired but i need the money.
11-Pm
Grant came home with pizza, soda, and more craving food. Like damn diary this guy is so great to me. I wouldn't know what to do without him. Well i'm off to cuddle, I'll write more tomorrow.
10-20-15
Tuesday
8-Am
So I'm sorry that i haven't written in the past few days but i have been vomiting for the past three days. I hate pregnancy. And on top of that i had to do a bunch of school work just to keep up with the rest of the class. So i started watching the movie The last battalion and omg i just love watching old war movies. Like okay i would rather sit and watch Saving Private Ryan than Twilight any day.
10-21-15
Wednesday
8:30-Am
So I didn't write this yesterday because i was busy but the art teacher basicly told me that i wasn't allowed to move on to the next project because my finished project wasn't done. And on top of that I'm a little over a month pregnant and i feel like shit. I just want to have this thing already.
10-22-15
Thursday
Noon
So it is a new day and Grant and I are going to amish country after school today and taking Friday off. I can't wait I love amish people there always so innocent and kind (sort of).
5-Pm
So Grant stopped at a rest area to change into some more appropriate attire. He changed into boots, Blue jeans, a cowboy hat, and a red and black flannel just so that he can”Blend in” I swear he is such a goober sometimes. We are arriving now, I'll write later.
10-23-15
Friday
1-Am
So i know that it is the foul reaches of the night but it's the only real free time that i have. So here's what happened. When we got there and if it wasn't for the car i would have sworn that Grant belonged there. I saw like four other people there dressed basicly the same as Grant, It was a bit scary. But on the bright side I stuck out like a sore thumb, hearing a pink and black plaid skirt overtop of fish net stockings with pink and black 3.5 inch Stiletto heels and a Black Death Cab For Cutie T-Shirt. My Ipod Generation one And a pair of purple headphones blasting Nirvana- Come as you are- Grant put his arm around me, plucked out my right earbud, spun me around so that we faced each other and leaned in and kissed me.. We rode horses, milked a cow (Okay so Grant milked it) but the horses were fun. I made mine jump a barrel and do other fun stuff while grant had trouble even mounting his. The horse that is, he had no trouble mounting me in the barn behind a bunch of hay.
10-25-15
Monday
9:45-Am
So I'm sitting in my third period English class talking to Shayne and Jordyn. We are discussing pets, like usual. You see I have Kyro but Shayne has two dogs and Jordyn has like three dogs, four cats, and a hedgehog. Her hedgehog Alex is so freaking cute. I have one of my earbuds in I am listening to “I will follow you into the dark by: Death Cab For Cutie. I freaking love that song. I am reading the book Ghostgirl by Tonya Hurley. It is such a good book I have read it twice already.
10:15-Am
I'm practically starving, I can't wait for lunch. But right now I am sitting in art talkin got Shayne and Myra. Myra is a good friend of mine, She is kind and smart and pretty good at art. Right now we are working on self portraits and mine sucks compared to hers. But if you really want to talk about good art our friend Brenda (who sort of hates me for like no reason) Is like an art goddess. She is amazing and works pretty fast as well. I love her work. But right now we are talking about how Myra’s ex Boyfriend left her on her Birthday, He is a big dick and i don't like him whatsoever. I don't like anyone that pulls some shit like that. They were together for two years and he left her for another woman on her birthday. That's just fucked up really, and to think I always thought they were a cute couple.
Oh so there is only like 6 days until Halloween, I'm so ecstatic. I can't wait to go out and scare the little kids.
10-27-15
Wednesday
Noon
“Sitting in this room playing Russian roulette, finger on the trigger to my dear Juliet, out through the window see her backdrop silhouette.”
I love this song as well it's Not good enough by: Escape The Fate. So yeah i'm sitting in lunch and there's this new freshman girl who went up to go get her lunch and she straight ate chair, she tripped over basically nothing and fell into like four chairs.
10-31-15
Saterday
Noon
“This is Halloween, This Halloween.” It's Halloween, I fucking love this day. I'm having Myra do my makeup Grant is out with his buddies getting me a surprise for today, when he gets back he should be getting dressed. We are going to go to a Halloween rave party later.
Okay so Grant just got back and guess what he bought me, a fucking taser that's what. That's like 50,000 volts, holy shit. I'm guessing that I might have to use this at the party tonight in case someone tries anything stupid. I will straight taze a bitch too like i am not trying to get fucked up at this party.Monster is all that i'm going to have for the night, no drugs. You know what i don't even think i'm going to go, I'm going to talk grant out of it.
5-Pm
Okay so we are not going to the rave party but we are going to a haunted prison for the night. We should get there at around 7-7:30Pm.
Apparently this wasn't a sign of concern for anyone. And yes, it is in comic sans. And yes, I did copy and paste it and sent it to my friends. No, I don't have the school shooting part. And apparently there's supposed to be at least 40 sex scenes. Like the readers even want to read one.
I guess since I'm a lesbian it's perfectly understandable that he might feel like he has to shoot up the school. I guess since I'm a lesbian it's perfectly understandable that he sexually harasses me.
Garet also likes to talk about Adolf Hitler a lot. He also thinks that absolutely nobody at school is Jewish, because they're either all Christian freaks or atheists. He has recently proclaimed Christianity because he has seen the light. In the past, he has proclaimed Paganism and Satanism.
Garet tries to be special and unique. Unfortunately, for him, he's nothing more than another creep who has to use 'shock value' to stand out.
Also, after hearing about some guy murdering a child, Garet had this to say (blue is my good friend who has supported me through this emotional mess):
Yes, he is literally like that the entire time he's in person, too. Whenever he gets criticism, he always says it's his opinion. No, it's not an opinion. Even if it was an opinion that you thought that it was cool that a baby is dead because of some psycho murdering it, it's still a very stupid opinion that you should be locked up in jail for.
At the end of the day, Garet, I don't care about any of your suffering. It doesn't mean you get to treat people the way you have. You have ruined my reputation, my happiness, severely damaged my friendships with people because I actually feel like I have the right to stand up for myself, and you have made me scared to go to my own school. You have made me more depressed than alcohol could ever make me.
But you know what, Garet? You're a failure. You don't know anything about life and you feel like you should have the opportunity to walk all over people. Newsflash: you don't. If you're offended my this blog post, you should realize two things. One, I'm not a perfect person. Two, you get the same respect you give in life. So I gave you the amount of respect you've given me all these years.
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