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Being the Second Option.
Okay, so before I get into the depressing mess this post will be, I have something to announce. First off, happy belated Easter! Wouldn't have been belated if I wrote this blog post sooner, but I never said I was entirely perfect. Second off, the announcement. I will be writing a blog post every single day in May. Even on my birthday. Psst, my birthday is the 1st of May.
Just send me pictures of screenshots from HTGAWM for my birthday. I promise I don't have them all. My submit is here on Tumblr, I think.
I really like Katie Findlay, too, remember that.
Anyways, on to the serious stuff. Being the second option. Now, this can be taken as a platonic friendship or an, er, not so platonic relationship. Whatever floats your boat, dear.
I've been thinking about this topic a lot in the past few days. It's something that's hitting close to home right now, to say the least. I don't like it, but I've always been the second- or third, fourth, fifth- option in life. I've had very few friends that put me above others.
Here's the thing. We can't make people like us. We can't make people prefer us. We just sit in the back watching all this crap go down, down, in an earlier round (I'm so sorry oh my god) and hope. Hope that things don't work out, that we're victorious. We get jealous. We're human. We do this.
I guess this path makes us hate more than we should. Maybe that speeds up the part when we grow even more distant- that part where we start to hate the first option. Maybe it wouldn't kill us to say hi to the first option.
In my own personal experience, there's a few stages to this.
Well, first off, sorry for the lack of thought into color choice there.
Second off, add a vague fight after you realize you hate the new person somewhere around there.
Here is the thing. I'm not going to make some speech about how you are the only person you should really be there for in life 100%. I'm not going to make some speech about how you'll be happy in the end. I'm not going to say anything like that.
Why? Because losing people to others sucks. You feel like you did something wrong somewhere along the way. You probably want to play this song and try to relate even though this song has nothing to do about friendship dying as I realize as I copy and paste the link.
You probably feel like you're not good enough. It has nothing to do with you. It has absolutely nothing to do with you. You are good enough and you do not deserve this.
What I want to say is that, one day, you'll meet someone who will put you first in a majority of things and actually consider you their best friend. I get it might take awhile, but for all my readers who watch YouTube, guess what YouTubers had the same things happen to them for years? Who has an absolute best friend now?
One day, you'll be alright.
